Jesse's all poor-me and my Heineken, I'm sure a soulful singer, blah, blah, blah and Betty gives him the pep talk about how his band is so great and she's sure they're going to make it. Ladies, nod your head if you've ever uttered that phrase to some guy. Yep, I thought so. He says, "You know what's cool about you, Betty, I really think you mean that. See ya!" and he sort of slams the door in her face. I actually thought that maybe he had a girl in his apartment or something.
Yeah, peddle your religion somewhere else.
In Daniel's office, he and Connor are toasting to their XY chromosome combo with beer and the fist-bump. Connor has some ideas for Daniel to save money and Daniel makes the boneheaded move of telling Connor he "doesn't have to run every idea" by him. Great, now Connor is going to go rogue!
Wilhelmina, watching, echoes my thoughts (it's like we're twins except I'm pasty white with no cleavage and I adopt dogs instead of kicking them) says, "I hate that stupid fist bump." Marc comes flying up to her, wearing what I can only imagine are Jackie O's other set of pearls, the single strand. He probably has a man purse too.
"Talk to me," she says to Marc. Unfortunately, they can't get out of Connor's contract without a huge buyout. Wish I had that option sometimes! Wilhelmina "put that in there to screw Daniel, not me!" Don't close the door to that idea so quickly Willie! She wants dirt on Connor because doesn't want to be overruled by "two silly white boys." Speaking to the choir and no worries - January 20th is right around the corner! Marc tries to fist bump her and she smacks his fist into his nose. Nice shot.
My deviated septum - completely fixed now!
Back at Betty's, she shows up the reason she's not getting any action: She's in PJs with what I can only assume are attached feet and her hair looks like Pocahontas, which is harder to spell than you'd think. Schexy! Walking out of her bathroom - wait, hold the freaking phone, she has a toilet and sink in a bathroom, but the tub is in the living room. Oh zany dramady, does it ever end? Anyhoodle, she walks out of her half bath into her full bath and sees pictures of Amanda and Marc everywhere.
"Oh my God," Amanda says, "we totally match." Only if you were matching the pages of Garanimals and Victoria's Secret in some sick parallel universe. Amanda is wearing a bra and panties set with matching garters and red hose, always so comfy for sleeping. "You and I are going to have so much fun," she says, awkwardly hugging Betty. Guys everywhere don't know whether or not to be aroused or sickened or a little of both. Of course, if they're watching this show, they probably don't care.
If you scratch fast enough, Amanda will twitch her leg!
Amanda is, as expected, a bad roommate. She lets Halston the cat-dog eat Betty's lunch, then snuggles up with Betty in bed because the sofa isn't comfortable. I would imagine Betty's hairy legs and Brillo-pad eyebrows would be really itchy, so I'm not sure how much of a step up that was. Betty is complaining to Christina who by the way is no friend if she continues to let Betty wear that particular vomit-green jacquard 80s bolero-y thing with the hot pink printed blouse.
Are you sure you don't want to buy from Amway?
Amanda shows up just in time to hear Christina mention Betty's crush. "I knew it. It must be someone from the building, you're always darting in and out all sweaty and mysterious." No, that just sounds like she's taking out the garbage. Amanda is wearing Betty's leggings...as a dress, with the other legging as a scarf. Betty, you have fat legs. And? They look better on Amanda. And seriously, is Betty channeling Asian tourist because she's wearing 3 majorly bad patterns in one outfit, and I haven't even seen her hose or shoes. Where is What Not To Wear when you need them?
Amanda tries to help Betty by recommending she invite Jesse to the Mode party to check out if he's a serial killer. If he is, he can "just find someone else to cut into pieces," much like your leggings. Betty agrees. This so cannot go wrong!
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Comments (2)
omg, I don't watch this show, but I LOVE the intro you wrote for it. Because I totally went through a phase of dating (and getting dumped by) sensitive-rocker-wannabe-guitar guy!
Sigh.
Anyway, that just really made me laugh out loud. xoxo
1 of 2 | Posted by MandaMo | Posted on November 13, 2008 2:49 PM
MandaMo - thanks for reading. I went through that phase too (college band, sigh) but he wouldn't dump his girlfriend for me, wahhh!Of course, he was the bass player, so what kind of dork was I? :)
2 of 2 | Posted by dearcrabby | Posted on November 14, 2008 9:36 AM