Testimonials

Daniel doesn't believe her and tries to slam the door in her face, but she stops it again. Daniel should really go to the gym more. Willie leans in and whispers, "Stony Brook." Unless that's a new subdivision in Westport, I'm guessing it's an INSANE ASYLYM. Oh, sorry, that was insensitive. A facility for reality-challenged nutcases.

"Ask my sister about Stony Brook if you really want to get to know her." Slam! Finally.

"How was I?" She asks Marc.

"Excellent. Sincere, but not condescending, with just the right dash of menace." Just like Papi's cupcakes! "And your breasts, of course, look amazing." Just like Papi's cupcakes! Oh Marc, swinging back to the other side? Say it ain't so!

Gazonga City, baby!

Christina is trying to open a window, probably to jump to her death for carrying the spawn of Satan, when Renee walks in saying Wilhelmina probably had it bolted shut. Yeah, or for safety, bonehead. There are no screens in that thing and you are up high! "Evil robots don't need oxygen." No, but they do need love. And Botox.

While Renee fusses with the window, Christina walks over and awkwardly (or so I thought) spies a candle and says "This should freshen things up a bit." Because nothing says "fresh" like perfumed wax. She goes to light it and Renee freaks out like only reformed pyromaniacs do and says, "No candles EVER," and puts the candle out with her fingers. Klassy! Please let her burn something down!

That's one way to ruin a manicure

Christina phones Betty to tell her something weird is going on (ya think?), but Betty's phone is so bedazzled it won't work. That's actually a great excuse if you want to get off the phone with someone, "I'm so sorry - bad connection! It's the bedazzling of the phone!" Maybe text-messaging isn't a phenomenon, it's just that a lot of the letters are getting lost in the glitter. IDK, LOL.

Christina goes on the hunt for info by ingeniously hiding one of the baby monitors in a pantry. Why did they buy one so soon - she's not even showing. Unless Wilhelmina uses it when Marc stays over?

Betty's over-eager face is front and center as she sings, "Birthday girl in the ho-ouse," doing the "raise the roof" motion with her hand. Betty, file that under Justin's "don't do that" rule. "Ready for adventure!"

Door opens to Charlie, all prego-d out, saying, "I love adventures, where are we going?" Given what she is wearing, straight to the Wonka Factory. And? Oh crap!

Is this the Oompa Loompa audition?

Charlie starts blabbering about how she's been trying "for months" to get into some parenting seminar with Dr. Whatever who is this amazing baby guru (is he a guru of babies, or a baby who's a guru?). This weekend she was actually able to get into his seminar. I wonder if the first rule of his "parent" seminar is that both parents should be involved with their child as opposed to living on opposite sides of the country dating other people.

Henry shows up, sans huevos apparently, and asks Charlie could give them a minute. "Oh, the baby just kicked. He must be happy to see his daddy." Or he knows you're a totally beyotch and he's attempting to seek a rent-controlled uterus elsewhere.

Henry jumps into the hallway to tell Betty, "she just showed up." First of all, where is this chick getting her money to make a plane reservation 24 hours in advance with no problem to take a parenting class with baby Deepak Chopra, but can't afford to stay at a hotel? Because if I were Henry, I would have mentioned that as I shut the door in her face. And second, Henry, your door clearly has a keyhole viewer. USE IT NEXT TIME. That's how I avoid the multi-level marketing scam of the Girl Scouts and their cookies.

Henry tells Betty the can still go away for the weekend and Charlie can go to the seminar on her own. My answer? Good. That's what we'll do, now get the car. But Betty wusses out because it's "for the baby." Blech. She decides to put together the most awesome birthday extravaganza ever in the history of the world. Betty, read the recap title. Ain't gonna happen. Save your energy.

"Betty, you're unbelievable," Henry says, although what I heard was, "Betty, you're an incredible doormat who just got bested by an Oompa-Loompa."

"Only when I'm with you." Door. Mat. Smooches.

"Henryyyy, I can't find the toothpaste," Charlie says to remind Betty she's still claiming Henry and that competition over a man shouldn't derail good dental hygiene.

« Desperate Housewives: Breakin' the Law, Breakin' the Law! | Main | American Idol: And Then There Were Four: Voodoo Dolls Really Do Work! »

Posted in Ugly Betty by DearCrabby at 7:38 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)
Last Comment: Dear Crabby on May 6, 2008 09:25 AM.