Betty is in the midst of reserving a table for 2 on the patio of the hottest restaurant in town for that evening and wonders why they are telling her no. Duh. Wait - manipulative Betty rears her ugly head and tells them that Mode won't need the Pemberly Inn for their fashion week party where they spend thousand and thousands of dollars. Please, does that ever work? If I were the manager, I'd slam the phone down. If they're hot, they were already booked last season. Oh wait, something did open up. Go figure.
As she's making these reservations, Gio is walking by with his cart. Shouldn't he be at the deli he started? Or is it still closed from when Betty smashed the window? If so, his insurance sucks! He sits on her desk and gets a little too into her personal space to the point he actually freaks her out when she turns around, much like the waiter at the restaurant I went to this evening. (If you are going to keep shoving your elbows in my face, at least moisturize them dude). Or maybe she's scared because he looks like he just stepped out of American History X.
He rubs his buzz cut and says, "Summer's coming, gotta let the head breathe." Well, I'm sure the lice appreciate your concern. "Pemberly Inn. What's the occasion?"
Breathe my little friends, breathe!
"Oh, it's my birthday."
"Going to dinner with Henry?" She tells them originally they planned a weekend getaway with the senior center members, but Charlie showed up and ruined it.
"Ah, baby mama." You know, that phrase never gets old.
Ignoring that comment, Betty tells him about the perfect night she has planned with Henry. "Intimate dinner, a concert (Twisted Sister?!) and fireworks in the park."
"The only thing missing is a carriage ride." D'oh! How did he know? Betty gives him a freaky look.
"Why did you say that?" Uh, because there are carriage rides all over the park in New York. Stay with me here.
"Just seems like something you'd be into." Because of her Disney fetish? Her favorite website, www.so-cute-its-sick.com?
"It was good to see you," is the blow-off signal she gives him. Get back to the cart, deli boy.
"Sorry we don't talk as much anymore," he says. Becaaause...you're at your deli working now? Besides, all he has to do is wait to be rebound guy when Henry heads west to be a baby papa.
Back at the lair, Renee storms into Willie's kitchen in a nice black top, cardigan, and what I believe is a pair of control-top panties. Woman, you really are crazy. That look hasn't worked since the 80s. "You bitch! Why are you trying to break up me and Daniel?" Which I believe is grammatically correct but always sounds awkward.
Pissed AND pantless - not a good combo
"We both know what happens to you when things get too serious with men." She sets them on fire?
"This is nothing like Stony Brook." Rut-roh. Am I sensing a stalker? Pyro stalker? Fingers crossed!
"Good, it took a lot of work to clean up that mess." Like a group of firemen? CSI: Long Island?
"I'm warning you, leave us alone or you'll regret it," Renee spats. Really? As much as you are going to regret paying $350 a night plus tax at a New York hotel when she kicks your sorry behind out of her cush digs? "I'm not the only one around here who has secrets." No, but you are pantless, so Willie has sort of won a moral victory. As Renee leaves, the camera focuses on the baby monitor which Christina has placed in the pantry. Christina, listening in, writes "Stony Brook" on a sheet of paper. As opposed to the bathroom wall.
Betty's on the phone. "Yes Amanda?"
"What's your favorite thing about getting old?" I know for me, it's switching to decaf and clogs. "Is it your hair thinning or when kids ask you about Vietnam?" Hee. "And that guy you're always pretending is your boyfriend is on line 2." Why didn't he call Betty's line directly?
"Hi Birthday Girl!" He's picking her up some of her favorite Gerber daisies (Genus: Carriagus Rideus) and she tells him of their exciting plans for the evening. "One word: Fireworks!"
"That's two words." Dork.
"No, technically that's one word," Betty dorks back.
"Nerdapolooza," Amanda chimes in. Couldn't agree more.
"Amanda, get off the phone," Betty says. Why? She's the most interesting participant right now.
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Comments (5)
Miss V.--I mean, DearCrabby--loved your Ugly Betty "Worst Birthday" recap., esp. George Clooney/IKEA,Three Foot High Club, afford the rights to Disney, and Way to go Writers' Strike.
And for the ones that would make an English teacher smile: big fraction=oxymoron, baby guru or guru who is a baby. And I love it that you know how to use subjunctive mood.
Finally, 1) all fragments in this comment are on purpose 2) yes, it's a good time to be silver.
1 of 5 | Posted by Clytemnestra | Posted on May 3, 2008 2:08 PM
Miss V.--I mean, DearCrabby--loved your Ugly Betty "Worst Birthday" recap., esp. George Clooney/IKEA,Three Foot High Club, afford the rights to Disney, and Way to go Writers' Strike. And for the ones that would make an English teacher smile: big fraction=oxymoron, baby guru or guru who is a baby. And I love it that you know how to use subjunctive mood. Finally, 1) all fragments in this comment are on purpose 2) yes, it's a good time to be silver.
2 of 5 | Posted by Clytemnestra | Posted on May 3, 2008 2:10 PM
Miss V.--I mean, DearCrabby--loved your Ugly Betty "Worst Birthday" recap., esp. George Clooney/IKEA,Three Foot High Club, afford the rights to Disney, and Way to go Writers' Strike. And for the ones that would make an English teacher smile: big fraction=oxymoron, baby guru or guru who is a baby. And I love it that you know how to use subjunctive mood. Finally, 1) all fragments in this comment are on purpose 2) yes, it's a good time to be silver.
3 of 5 | Posted by Clytemnestra | Posted on May 3, 2008 2:19 PM
Oy, I've out-dorked Betty and Henry by posting the same comment 3 times. I know--LOSER!Penance will be served by wearing a headband and ignoring my tweezers.
4 of 5 | Posted by Clytemnestra | Posted on May 3, 2008 2:41 PM
Ha! Thanks Clytemnestra, glad my English teacher is proud :) I honed my skills in her class...too bad she wouldn't let me use them when I was writing captions for the yearbook, ahem.
5 of 5 | Posted by Dear Crabby | Posted on May 6, 2008 9:25 AM