Suzuki is still reporting on the kidnapping and complains the police have been pretty tight-lipped with their information. As a result, he's forced to do some "old-fashioned wild speculation." Just like CNN! Suzuki explains how their graphics department combined Wilhelmina and Bradford and showed what their child would look like as an adult: A Chippendale's dancer! "Mother of pearl, the man is an Adonis." That's probably his stage name.
Let's remember Suzuki is a straight dad from Jersey.
This report had to hurt.
Over at Casa Suarez, Justin is all over this news as Hilda turns it off. He tells her he must watch it. "It's my O.J.," he says. Hilda tells him to go watch in the kitchen because they are about to start shooting Archie's little TV thing. Why isn't Justin at school? Why isn't Hilda work --- nevermind.
The TV station decides to set up in Hilda's salon so she's all happy. Archie says he wants people to know he's a supporter of small businesses and big boobs, and Hilda gets both votes, you know, if she actually ran a business. He thanks her for toning down the outfit (it's colorful and shows off her boobs; can't imagine what the other ones looked like). She thanks him for including her in on this. I will thank the first truck driver that runs over these two.
Hilda goes back into the kitchen and we hear Suzuki on the TV asking, "Where in the world is that baby?" just as Christina and Betty walk in...with that baby! Justin looks stunned but slightly excited. Hilda looks pissed. "You are kidding me," she says. They must be, because it seems like the cops might actually have Betty and Christina's houses under surveillance. I'm sure this ain't their first rodeo.
It's not what you think. We're lesbians and we got
David Crosby to donate sperm for our baby.
Oh, that IS what you thought. Well then.
Is there any flan left?
Back at Mode the security guards bring Willie and Marc into the surveillance room where they clearly see Stuart running down the back stairs with the baby. How many hours into this are we, like 4 if Suzuki could actually read his watch...and the police never thought to look at the security footage? Maybe this is their first rodeo and they all went as clowns?
Yes, because if TV has taught us anything, it's to
LOOK AT THE SECURITY CAMERAS WHEN LEAVING THE CRIME SCENE.
Marc's first reaction is at least the baby is safe. "Now all we need to find Christina is a team of booze-sniffing hounds," he says. Too bad he didn't say treat-sniffing, that would have gotten them a team of dogs faster. But Willie doesn't seem quite as relieved. Why. WHY?
"If Christina has the baby, then the truth is going to get out," she says. "What truth are you referring to," Marc asks, looking sideways and sort of getting what is going on. "I had the DNA test faked. The baby's not mine. It's Christina's." Marc removes his gay game face and wears one of surprise (and relief, I'm guessing, as this may be his way of getting rid of that crying, pooping shackle).
Marc is sick and looks like he could slam down a Pepto shooter. "So let me get this straight," he says, "you faked the DNA test so you could claim Christina's baby as your own." Is that the worst thing she's ever done? Not even today. Wise up, Marc! Willie is having none of the ethical side of this argument. If people find out she's not William's mother, she'll lose her claim to the Meade fortune.
Willie says they need to find that baby immediately and to do that, they need to know where Christina is. "She could be anywhere!" Marc says. Try her home, try Betty's, and oh-by-the-way, get the police involved because they could find her faster and probably wouldn't listen to Christina when she said the baby was hers. They'd just chalk it up to surrogate crazy and give the baby back to Willie. Marc wonders where Christina would turn in a time like this. "You would turn...to your best friend," Willie says. "Betty!" they say together.
Back at Casa Lindberg, Justin says, "My God, you two are the kidnappers? I totally called that!" Betty tells them that they are not, except technically they are, but things are just really complicated. This sounds like a junior high dance. Justin wants to tell his drama club, Hilda tells him to www.zip-it.com, and then tells Betty and Christina to get the hell outta there because a really boring councilman's bit for borough president hangs in the balance!
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Comments (2)
Great recap! I missed some of the details while watching.
BTW - Heard any rumors about Rebecca coming back? They never mention her character on the show. How about Salma? Either one would be a plus.
1 of 2 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on May 12, 2009 9:14 AM
Rebecca just filmed a pilot for ABC called Eastwick, so if it takes off probably not (bummer!). IMDB is showing Salma has a lot of projects going right now, so who knows! Henry's coming back so anything is possible - now if we can just get Gio back!
2 of 2 | Posted by dearcrabby | Posted on May 17, 2009 3:26 PM