In Daniel's office, Betty is all excited about Molly's poetry slam. They should invite Councilman! ZZZZZZ. Betty says she can't wait to hear Molly's poem and Daniel just happens to have a copy of it. Betty reads it and is like, holy majoly, it's about your sex life with Molly. Daniel thought it was about the ocean. Then he freaks out about her reading it in front of everyone he invited - including all of Mode. He shouldn't worry about the magazine employees showing up since everyone is probably working a second job just in case.
Uh, Daniel, a haiku is 5/7/5 syllables, not pages!
Later that evening, Betty is back at her old apartment with Amanda for her "sexification." Yikes. Amanda says something that is sort of poetic and coolly insightful, "I miss the we I was with us." Heh. Marc comes out of nowhere and complains that sexifying Betty is impossible with the 2-hour deadline. Can't argue there. "Where do we even begin? Look at her!" They start mocking her by waving lasers over her body.
They spend the evening teaching her how to smell good, eat seductively, suck on a straw with pursed lips, and tickle him with a feather. Wouldn't it be better to do her hair and makeup? Put on a push-up bra? It's less creepy. Amanda suggests losing the braces and Marc the glasses. Ding! I'm sorry, those have to stay. Then Amanda hands her a ladle. "What's this for?" Betty asks. "When it happens, you'll know." What the hell is she planning to cook? They wish her luck and kids, she's going to need a lot of it!
SCHEXY!
Back at Willie's that night, she wakes to hear something growling. Grabbing a baseball bat from under the bed, she walks out into the living room and says, "WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?" The guy turns around and holds up his hand...with a pacifier in it. Guess it's the new and HOTT night nanny. Seems like Marc may have wanted to mention a guy Willie didn't know would be in her house overnight.
That nuck-nuck is not the oral gratification Willie is looking for.
Turns out Night Manny James was reading William that three-bears story and he got a little worked up. Speaking of worked up, Willie cannot take her eyes off Manny's sweet, sweet ass.
Hilda is at a restaurant with Councilman and even when he tells her a dish at the restaurant is "killer," he sounds boring. Hilda is bored. But she looks great. He says, "Don't move. You look really pretty in that light." She moves. Hilda starts to tell him she doesn't think it's going to work out when cheesy cheap blonde shows up.
"Archie?" she says, and he makes a face like "oh crap." He introduces Hilda to "Felissa" (Felissa?) and says they used to be neighbors. "We used to be more than that," she says between gum snaps. "Biggest mistake I ever made was letting him slip through my fingers," she says. Hilda is intrigued and suddenly finds Councilman hot. She's one of those women.
This guy has NO taste.
Back at the dorm, Daniel tells Molly he made a few edits on her poem and when he hands it to her it's covered in red ink like he's become Mrs. Krabappel and she's Bart Simpson. Who the hell does he think he is, editing a dying woman's poems? He says he thought the poem was too intimate and doesn't want her to read it in front of his coworkers. He could have said that without bleeding all over the poem, damn! What I don't understand is how Molly completely defers to him on this. She and Councilman should date - better match, I think.
She's dying, not defending her thesis. Give it a rest.
Back at the restaurant, Felissa is sitting at their table and Councilman is like, our food is here, could you take off please? She says to Councilman, "Call me, sugar." Unless it was "Call me Sugar," I do feel a little sick with her around. Hilda says she's quite the talker, then takes Councilman's hand and says, "Hello, we're on a date here." Hilda, Hilda, Hilda.
Over at Amanda and Marc's apartment that Betty is going to use for some hot lovin' tonight, we see a candle burning next to that purple feather and hear the iPod playing some soft music. This is going to go so wrong, so fast, I can just tell, like when a thunderstorm is coming and the dogs panic because it might be the one that gets them.
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Comments (6)
Dear Crabby -
Excellent recap (of a show that is getting sillier by the week!)
No seriously, the first season of this show, I was in love! And look, I completely understand that this is based on Spanish soap operas, and therefore reality must be suspended during viewing, but come the FUCK on!
So, Matt is super rich and hides that by "forgetting" his wallet a bunch of times therefore making the financially unstable girl pay for their dinners/coffees/whatever. Not very creative writers, I think they should've had him "forget" his wallet because he doesn't actually have one - he's homeless and living on a bench at Penn Station! I don't know - something a little more gripping like that.
And, now he's had a lot of sex with a lot of different women? Um, WHAT? I hate that story line, while they were sitting in the therapist's office I thought he was going to be like, I have an STD or something a little more realistic - not, I'm a man-whore. I love how he's being treated like a "nice guy in recovery from a difficult life of random sex" whereas if this were a woman character, she'd be written off as a nasty slut. Ugh - seriously, Gio left and brought all the creativity of this show with him!
Sorry for the rant, but GRRRRRRRrrrrr!
(I do kind of love the councilman though, something about Karate Kid at age 45 is still pretty adorable!)
1 of 6 | Posted by carmelicious | Posted on March 24, 2009 9:57 AM
Good recap once again, too bad it's for a show that appears to be in steep decline.
I was disgusted by this episode (Betty prances into bed with a sex addict?!). Seriously creepy content. I don't plan to watch anymore, but I may drop by and read your recaps anyway. Yes, they are that good.
I am a Gio fan and like seeing your mentions of him. You seem to have a fond memory for the character (thank you!) unlike the show. Why? Why God? Why was he dumped from the show?
Curious, did pickle = Gio?
2 of 6 | Posted by bgroman | Posted on March 24, 2009 5:56 PM
Great recap. I'm not ready to abandon ship, but it does seem to have lost something. I'm hoping Rebecca R will return soon. I also miss Gio (please sign the online petition - haha).
Amanda and Mark are still great together (or separately).
One thing this show has in common with a lot of others - they incorporate the real life economic crisis into the storylines. I watch TV to ESCAPE (okay, ignore) my own problems; not to be reminded of them.
The promiscuity aspect - not to mention the STD possibilities - of Matt's past is a real turn-off.
(I'm a man who never understood how anyone could go to a prostitude - even before the onslaught of AIDS - you just don't know WHERE that thang has been!)
When it comes to sex partners, less is usually more. Some things don't change.
3 of 6 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on March 25, 2009 7:55 AM
Okay, call me naive, but what's a "carwash", metaphorically speaking?
BTW, who wants to know about anyone's pubic hair removal? When did it become pubic knowledge?
Also, I did not recognize Ralph Macchio until I saw his name in the credits and figured it out!
4 of 6 | Posted by scottywrangler | Posted on March 27, 2009 8:44 AM
Great recap as always! I can't even stand to watch the lame ass show anymore so I just come here to find out what happened.
5 of 6 | Posted by E-fo | Posted on March 28, 2009 9:16 AM
Before, I couldn't get past the fact that, while Matt is reasonably cute, he and Betty have no real sexual or romantic chemistry. They were okay though only so-so as friends (do these actors even bother to run lines together to give them some semblance of making a connection?). As a couple they're just bleh. Now I can't get past the fact that they have no chemistry plus he has a serious, not easily treated mental illness and maybe a long history of spreading STD around. And she hearts him? This girl who decided she "just didn't have those feelings" for a sane guy who unabashedly adored her and was so hot his kiss made her moan with desire and dancing with him got her all squirmy. Damn, you're right she should run call Gio!
6 of 6 | Posted by Livia | Posted on April 10, 2009 10:30 PM