Hi guys, welcome to our last bit of V goodness until 2010. A lot of stuff happens tonight, but the main thing you can take away from this episode is that vaccinations are bad, and there are a horde of evil aliens just waiting to swoop in and enslave us. Awww, it looks like Jenny McCarthy and Lou Dobbs are writing together again, how sweet. So make the jump and see what happens this week
Okay, our episode starts with, wow all sorts of stuff. We're in a parking garage and FBI Mom finds Chubby Beard lying on the ground. She's been to Quantico, so she asks him what's wrong. My bets are he's just been shot or the screenwriter is about to let us know he suffers from narcolepsy. FBI Mom sees The Steven Seagal Enabler walking towards her and Chubby Beard. FBI Mom stands up and The Steven Seagal Enabler pulls out a gun and points at her, annnnnnnnnnddddddd...
We cut to the front of the Our Lady of Plot Points church, and we see some text on the screen telling us it's 14 hours earlier. Damn! The director is getting all In Medias Res on our uncultured butts this week. I guess somebody wanted to prove to their uncle before the holiday that film school wasn't a complete waste of time. All I'm going to say about this, is the world needs ditch diggers too.
Anyway, we go inside and back to that meeting between FBI Mom, Soap Opera Priest, The Steven Seagal Enabler, and Chubby Beard we thought was over last week, no such luck. Chubby Beard is reminding us his whole family got killed, but FBI Mom is more interested in hearing how The Steven Seagal Enabler got into the V fighting biz. Did I say interested? Actually she's working an I-know-you're-a-big-fat-fibber-face at The SSE. Hmmm, she's in law enforcement, and she's highly suspicious of the one black person in the room? Hey, I'm not jumping to any conclusions, but I am pointing out the facts.
Of course it doesn't help that The Steven Seagal Enabler's story boils down to "oh I've just been doing it for awhile." The only way he could look more untrustworthy in this scene is if he had a flashing neon sign on his forehead that said Lying Lizard.
It doesn't matter, because Chubby Beard stands up for The SSE and points out he saved CB's life back at the warehouse. And speaking of the warehouse, Chubby Beard wants to figure out how they can give the V's a big plate of the whoopass as payback. Everyone looks at Chubby Beard like he just said he wears pants with a 32 inch waist, and FBI Mom points out that with only four of them they can't slug it out with the V's.
This doesn't faze Chubby Beard because he's a moron, bad assed alien fighter. Chubby Beard says they don't need to fight the V's; all they need to do is catch one V and peel off his human suit. Then, they just get booked on The View, and problem solveded.
Everyone thinks this isn't a good idea, especially the guy in the human suit, The Steven Seagal Enabler. The SSE points out that if the V's secret gets out the V's will crush humanity, which as much as all of them would love to hang with Whoopie for the morning, is a little too high of a price to pay. Chubby Beard looks at The Steven Seagal Enabler like he's a wussy, but doesn't say anything because Morris Chesnut looks like he knows how to work all the machines in the gym, and Chubby Beard looks like he uses donuts to make the pain go away.
The meeting breaks up and when they go outside Chubby Beard has a moment of clarity and asks The Steven Seagal Enabler why he didn't just tell FBI Mom and Soap Opera Priest he's a V. The Steven Seagal Enabler doesn't want to talk about that, instead he tells Chubby Beard he better not ever hear him talking about skinning a V again. This attitude makes sense for The Steven Seagal Enabler's character, but he doesn't answer Chubby Beard's question, and just like that logic is off the set for the rest of the episode.
Creepy Gopher Guy fills Anna in on Denthead getting killed last week, and she is pissed. She tells him to have V Doc find out what happened toot sweet.
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Comments (9)
Charlie McCarthy doll? Migraine Carrier? Seriously WB, I spit hot coffee into my lap and laptop.
Great job - I also enjoyed your take on why we are waiting till MARCH for the new shows (my bad, last week I thought it was only January).
BF opined that since HSMK got a look at the "inner workings" this might come in handy if he switches sides. Still thinking he might become a resistance fighter.
Agree this was not quite the height of last week, but still held my interest for the hour. See everyone in March, and thanks WaffleBoy for your awesome (and computer damaging) recaps...
1 of 9 | Posted by njgasmifan | Posted on December 1, 2009 8:00 AM
"Everyone looks at Chubby Beard like he just said he wears pants with a 32 inch waist"
I know this look. It has been directed at me before. Thank you, WaffleBoy... I laughed, but I'm crying on the inside.
Brilliant as usual (I especially love "Our Lady of Plot Points" and "Zac Efron hair without the Zac Efron price"!) and now I'm kinda sad that we won't see another episode for three months. OK, I'm not so broken up over that, but it'll be three months before we get another kickass recap from you on it.
As for the HSMK, his story kinda seems to be following the original miniseries where ultra-hot BeastMaster Marc Singer was estranged from his son, and then the V's stoled him and brainwashed him to like reruns of "The Golden Girls" because the lead V-lady (named Diana) looked exactly like Delta Burke only skinnier and with no balding Gerald McRaney tagging along. Plus I don't think Delta Burke ever ate gerbils like the original V Diana did. And where is that in this series? I would love to see them chomping down on some rodentia.
Also, is it just me, or does the V-Doc look uncomfortably like Rocco Dispirited from TV? Every time he comes on screen I keep thinking he's going to go yell at his 70-year-old mother to make with the meatballs a bit faster.
I will miss these terribly, but I always wuv you WaffleBoy!
love, J-Mo :)
2 of 9 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on December 1, 2009 9:26 AM
Great recap, as usual. I'll miss the recaps more than the actual show. "...giggling like somebody just said nutsack". That's gold, Jerry!!
Anyway, I was disappointed at the rapid demise of Denthead. I thought he would have turned into a good antagonist for FBI mom. Oh, Denthead, we barely knew thee.
3 of 9 | Posted by Vince | Posted on December 1, 2009 11:19 AM
OK, just like the scene in the "engine room," I am going to call shenanigans with the pregnancy scene. If the Vs can predict a person's future medical outcome, then they should be able to tell that Oblivia's fetus is only half human.
Oh yeah, and this is a big one...
Humans cant mate with lizards. One would assume that with some genetic manipulation, you could produce a hybrid, but for two people of different species to randomly hookup? Doubtful, but then again, we are talking about a show whose premise is that a race of lizards in human skin are planning to take over the planet.
4 of 9 | Posted by blkarkitect | Posted on December 1, 2009 2:23 PM
@blkarkitect: You would think they would be able to tell the baby was mixed species with their advanced scanners, but that would ruin a perfectly good story for the writers. The pregnancy is just a carryover from the original miniseries where the two babies were born, one more reptile and one more human. When the reptilian one died the resistance discovered the germs that would kill the Visitors (a plot point stolen from HG Wells).
5 of 9 | Posted by rj472 | Posted on December 1, 2009 3:34 PM
The Vs have pretty decent genetic technology. If they can grow human skin suits it isn't much of a stretch to think that they are capable of making working copies of the naughty bitz too. A bit squicky to think about but there you go.
I think they are screwing with the media guy though.
Anyways, looking forward to reading more recaps next year. Enjoy the break.
6 of 9 | Posted by Insidious Heresy | Posted on December 1, 2009 10:30 PM
Waffleboy,
For whatever reason the paragraph about your mom bringing home pizza followed by "And there you have it everybody, another kid gone wrong. All because his mom didn't bring home pizza." had me giggling like an idiot. I'm so glad to know that my son will be okay because I bring him pizza!
While I think it sucks that the break on this show is so long, I'm glad that Dollhouse is back and your recaps for it! I've missed both!
Great recap!
SWAK, PottyMouth
7 of 9 | Posted by PottyMouth | Posted on December 2, 2009 7:55 AM
@ J-Mo
I was totally getting the Rocco Dispirito vibe from the Doc as well. Unlike you, this thrilled me, because for some odd reason Rocco gives me the warm tinglies.
Still pissed that Wash got killed. AGAIN.
8 of 9 | Posted by Pegster | Posted on December 2, 2009 8:09 AM
Hi guys!
njgasmifan: thanks for the always sincere compliment of spitting up on yourself, I couldn't ask for more from a reader. I think HSMK will end up on Team Good Guys, but I'm hoping it's not for awhile for the following reason. The original miniseries was actually based on a book by Upton Sinclair called It Could Happen Here, a book about fascists taking over the US (the network had the show's producers give it a sci fi theme because everyone was voting Republican in the 80's), and one of the really creepy things the fascists did, in an extremely long list of creepy things, was get kids to turn on their parents. Now I like creepy plot twists like that, so I'm hoping HSMK stays with Team Lizard long enough to rat out his mom. I think it will make it that much better when he finally does get with the good guy program.
J-Mo: Awww J-Mo, it just means there is more of you to love. Have a cookie it will make you feel better. I'm going to have two. Mmmm, it's like a happy party in my tum tum!
Wow I haven't thought of Gerald McRaney in years. Am I the only one who noticed when he got on Major Dad and became a fake Marine he seemed to turn into a flaming a-hole? I mean he seemed great guy on Simon and Simon, but once Major Dad rolled around he decided to stay in character forever. I call this the Gavin MacLeod syndrome, after, well Gavin MacLeod. The guy always played kind of happy fun characters in McHale's Navy, Kelly's Heroes and peaked as Murray on Mary Tyler Moore. Then he starts playing a ship's Captain and every time I would see the guy on TV he's talking and acting like Captain Stubing. It's never helped matters that if I could actually talk to that character it would be to say something along the lines of "hey, you're the captain of a cruise ship, that's one step up from being the captain of the SS Booze Cruise, so lighten the F*#k up Captain Ahab." As you can see I spend a lot of time pondering life's most important questions, and yet never took a philosophy course in college.
On the Rocco front, I went and checked the picture of him that somebody slapped on the last box of kosher salt I bought at the store, and there is a resemblance. So what do you think? Should we change V Doc's nickname to something like Rocco DiLizard? We need to do something, because V Doc is a pretty lame nickname. What joker came up with that one? Oh yeah, me. Moving on.
Vince: Always glad to find another fan of the phrase nut sack, it's timeless. Also agree it sucks they lost Denthead so soon in the show. Alan Tudyk is fun to watch in anything he's in, he will be missed.
Pottymouth: Of course you bring pizza home for your kids, you're an awesome mom! That's why your kids are going to feel really sad when they eventually put you in a home too. I'm excited for Dollhouse to be coming back too. I'm also ticked that Fox announced there won't be another season, and are going to run two episodes a week this month when they know no one will be watching. But I'm going to concentrate on the positives, and I know tonight will be a cool TV night.
On the alien love child front, everybody made good points. blkarkitect is right, the odds of a reptilian race from another planet being able to breed with humans is pretty much nil. Keep in mind that humans and chimpanzees share something like 98% of the same DNA and are unable to reproduce, despite what that guy at work has been telling you about his brother-in-law.
That being said, Insidious Heresy made a good point, if the V's are that technologically advanced they could completely rework their baby making plumbing, although it would be nice if the writers would give us a reason for why they would want todo this that would really increase my viewing pleasure concerning this plot point.
Finally, as rj472 pointed this is a major story line from the original, and if there is one thing we have seen from this show, it is that it is going to be very faithful to the original story. For me personally, it's not my favorite part of the show right now, but if the writers can do something cool with it, I won't have a problem with it.
Anyway guys thanks for all the comments; you'd made this show a lot more fun for me, both to watch and to write about.
9 of 9 | Posted by waffleboy09 | Posted on December 4, 2009 10:00 AM