We start this week with Berto giving his psycho-stalker girl-on-the-side props for having won the duel with Geovannie and survived to compete in the finale. The fact that they're drinking sangria and groping in the chapel when he gives her props, only makes the act more endearing and romantic. Seriously, is nothing sacred in this show? And WTF is up with all the snuggling? Berto, Dude, either you've given up on your girlfriend at home or you're seriously playing with Gisel's somewhat unstable emotions.

It's like joining the mile high club

Jenn, Berto and Gisel rehash the duel over dinner like it was an office showdown between the boss and the office b*tch. Come on, every office has one. It's kind of touching to see the way Gisel lights up when she's the center of attention. It really takes so little to make a narcissistic personality happy.

I wish she'd get that boob job.

After dinner, Berto and Gisel hang out by the pool and Gisel flirts, while Berto hides under a blanket.

WTF do you think I'm doing under the blanket?

Gisel tells him that at the end it will just be Berto and herself left, clearly picturing the two of them walking off into the Miami sunset together. Of course, Gisel has conveniently forgotten the fact that as an actor, Jenn kicks her butt. But who am I to disrupt a delusional person's fantasy life? Then, we enter the Viva Hollywood land of strange double entendres. The editors show us a weird clip of Berto telling the camera that Gisel really seems to "want it" and that "just because you want something doesn't mean you should be doing it. You know what I mean?" No, Berto, at this point I'm a little confused. Are you talking about acting or sex? If you're talking about acting, I agree, Gisel really shouldn't be doing that. On the other hand, if you're talking about sex...well, then you probably should stop groping her in the f**king chapel.

Later that night, Berto assures the camera that anything he does is just playing the game. You know, the old "ends justifies the means" approach. I got to say that if my hubby was "playing the game" like Berto is, winning the $100,000 wouldn't even begin to be enough to save his tuchus. Meanwhile, Berto and Jenn munch on salad and bitch about what an annoying little princess Gisel is. Jenn, isn't too worried about Gisel, telling us that she can take her out at any point. I have to say that Jenn has my complete confidence; I have no doubt that she could break Gisel in two with a snap of her fingers. I'm also beginning to seriously hope that Jenn wins this thing. I've been a Berto fan up to now, but lately his two-faced, manipulative, manho behavior toward Gisel has been making me all kinds of disgusted.

The next morning Carlos comes in wearing a pair of nice tight jeans that are making this tired recapper mighty happy.

Note to Carlos: I will miss you.

After telling the chicos that they're looking all smiley and nice that morning, he turns them over to Uncle Walty's portrait. Uncle Walty tells them that they will now face the most difficult challenge of the competition and they must use all they have learned from the seven deadly sins. But, sadly, just as he's winding up the picture frame starts having some transmission issues and static overwhelms his image as Uncle Walty wails "what's happening?"

Uncle Walty's existential crisis

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Posted in Viva Hollywood! by YentaPatrol at 12:49 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)
Last Comment: MichyPR on Jun 3, 2008 08:43 AM.