After the break, The Hurricane doesn't show up to help his partner Rosie in their match against Cade and Murdoch. Instead, Gregory Helms (the Hurricane's real name) just stands at the top of the ramp and watches Rosie get his ass beat. Yawn. At least they finally dropped the Hurricane bit. I feel a little bad for Cade and Murdoch, though. After the initial push the WWE gave them, only to have them end up in a lame match like this? They didn't even give me a chance to make any Deliverance-rape jokes.

The main event pitted Kurt Angle against John Cena, with Mick Foley as special guest referee. Overall, the match is nothing special. A little interference from Carlito takes Foley out, so Eric Bischoff runs down to take his place. Of course, being Eric Bischoff, he can't help but screw Cena, giving Angle another cheap victory.

All in all, I can't believe how bad tonight's show was. I can't believe I watched it. In fact, for once I'm thinking maybe my wife is right. Did this week suck as bad as I think it did, or did it suck worse?

I Am JR's Colon. Sections:  1  |  2  |  3 

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Comments (19)

Mike:

Worse, if possible. During the Rock/Stone Cold/NWO/Hollywood Hogan/Sting in the rafters/Degeneration-X/Goldberg/Monday Night Wars glory days of the late 90's, so many non-fans were converted that I wish I had a buck for everybody who ever said, "NOW I know why you watch this stuff" to me.

Alas, the "I can't believe you watch this crap" days are back. I'm as close to jumping off the train as I've ever been in three decades of fandom.

sg-dub:

WAAAAAAAH!

Get someone who loves RAW to recap RAW! WAAAAAAH!

/Desparate Housewives commenter

Eddie D:

The Vince/JR sugery skit...worst ever....i cant believe professionals actually wrote that...incredible.

I want some more matches and some actual wrestling....not 11 minutes like we got on RAW this week...PS vote for a verbal debate between austin and coach...that would be a slap in the face to WWE

ha!:

I don't watch this show (or any pro wrestling - it depresses me). But when I initially saw that first image of the doctor holding the paper mache head, I thought "So is this what Charles Kimbrough from 'Murphy Brown' is doing these days?"

Then I got more depressed. (Thank God it's not him)

ha!

Bobbie:

While "threw up a little in my mouth" is so old, I wonder if I could ever get tired of "crapped a little..." Yum; delicious dish!

joop:

this show blew like cabbage out of jr's colon

America's Next Top Fan:

great recap. hate that i missed the show.

Mullethead:

I stopped watching WWF in 1987...when I was 13. I am still glad about that decision. I read the recap cause I love your recaps, but shit, who watches wrestling?

LCD bullshit, and a nice NASCrap tie-in to boot. The US is fucked.

(By the way, don't think I'm elitist b/c I don't watch this trash...I watch plenty of other trash. I'm a Gasm addict for christ's sake. I watch ANTM and the Real World.)

J.R.'s diseased colon:

Well timed sweet chin music?! HBK completly missed Kane for fucks sake! If you want good wrestling watch TNA

J.R.'s diseased colon:

I actually think that Vince's skit was funny but it would of been awesome if Vince pulled a big 'ole ham out of J.R.'s ass and then Super Porky(of Smackdown's new division) came in grabbed it from Vince and took a big ass bite! Also the nurse was hot as hell!

wah indeed...

the well-timed kick hit the big show. the kick at kane was just a bit outside.

realiTV fan:

Wow. It's like watching a trainwreck...only it wasn't a passenger train and nobody cares that it derailed. Nobody comes to clean it up or put it back on the tracks. Then it gets cancelled, only USA paid a lot of money to have it on the network so the train keeps on derailing.

Did I take that analogy too far? That's what it's like watching RAW. It went too far and it still wasn't funny.

umad:

mullethead, stick to ANTM gramps, you know nothing about modern day wrestling.

Jennifer T.:

I agree. It was so bad, even though I was watching it live, I kept trying to fastforward it. Even though I hated Cena as a punk bad guy, he is getting way too wussie as a good guy. Kane isn't scary anymore after the whole Leta thing. All of the bad guys are just losers and the good guys are pansies. Maybe I should try TNA.

Me:

Nurse Slobbernockers wow
Anyone know her real name ?

Bruce Goldinger:

This is what happens when Vince and family get mor involved than they should and the creative staff decides to keep their mouths shut and keep their jobs when the boss says "Hey, I've got a great idea..."

DiosMuyBueno:

"Hello, pot? It's the kettle. You're black."

I actually laughed out loud because of that line. I love you.

OMGIactuallywatchRAW:

Holy crap I agree Hello,pot? It's the kettle, you're black....2FUNNY! As for RAW I grew up watching wrestling and quit watching in like "88". My "ex" actually got my son into watching it so I started,again. Its nothing like it used to be. Jennifer T is correct TNA is good. I will get up at 1am and record it for my son..........1am? whats that about??

Tony Shavonie:

I miss WCW good ole days, never knew what was going to happen on Nitro...Sh*t Vince McMahon could have showed up as an nWo Member!

73