(6) John Cena vs Kurt Angle vs Chris Masters in a No-DQ, No Count-Out, No-Elimination, Triple Threat Submission Match Right off the bat Masters and Angle team up on the champ. Their newfound solidarity doesn't last long, though, as Angle takes out Masters the first chance he gets. Angle puts Cena in the Ankle Lock, which Masters breaks up. He then puts Angle in the MasterLock. Before Angle can submit, Cena breaks up the hold, only to be put in the MasterLock himself. At this, the fans start up with a hearty "Cena Sucks!" chant. Yes, yes he does.

"What's my name?
While Cena looks like he's out of it, he still doesn't submit. Just to be sure, Angle breaks up the hold by attacking Masters and trying to get the Ankle Lock. (Masters has the MasterLock, Angle has the Ankle Lock, Cena just has a lock on sucking.) Cena breaks that up, and Angle goes outside the ring for a chair. Cena kicks the chair back into Angle's face, then smacks it across Masters' knee. A couple more chair shots and Cena locks Masters in the STF, making him tap out.
Winner: John Cena via Submission.
The announce team can't believe Cena actually knew a submission hold. The McMahons, meanwhile, are back in the Leather Couch Room watching a monitor. "Next week it's time to take out the trash," says father to son. "And by the way, thanks for defending my sperm."
So what do you think? Will Eric Bischoff actually be fired next week? If so, will Coach lose his job too?
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Comments (9)
Great review, CG.
STF... WTF??
Weak ending. It would have been much more badass for Cena to get the "submission" by repeatedly bashing Masters with the chair to the point of unconsciousness.
Would've also been a good precursor to his inevitable heel turn.
1 of 9 | Posted by RD | Posted on November 30, 2005 1:56 PM
thanks.
i have no idea what the stf is. it would've made more sense if it were the stfu...
cena's gotta turn heel soon. i'm hoping that's what his 'lil show of aggression was all about last night.
2 of 9 | Posted by copygodd
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Posted on November 30, 2005 9:17 PM
The STF is a Stepover Toehold Facelock. It originated in Japan and is fairly new as far as pro-wrestling finishing moves are concerned. Back in WCW, when Erik Watts (son of then-booker/WCW head honcho Cowboy Bill Watts) was using the STF as his finisher during his extremely unpopular "rookie superstar" push, the joke was that it stood for Success Through Father.
3 of 9 | Posted by Mike | Posted on December 1, 2005 5:20 AM
makes sense.
thanks for the info.
4 of 9 | Posted by copygodd
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Posted on December 1, 2005 8:24 AM
Love the captions!
"cool."
5 of 9 | Posted by jess | Posted on December 1, 2005 12:50 PM
Uh, I beg to differ. Columbus is further away than "just down I-71 a bit." (142 miles to be exact.) And in Ohio, that's half the length of the state. It is worlds apart from skanky Cleveland. Get it right next time copygodd. :-)
6 of 9 | Posted by RealityTV4Me | Posted on December 1, 2005 1:58 PM
ah, it's just a quick two-hour drive, even with a stop for breakfast in mansfield.
and skanky? as compared to cbus? please. even though i was born and raised in columbus (graduated from THE ohio state university), i'm still a clevelander at heart. it's home to my beloved browns. all cbus has is the blue jackets. ugh.
but they're still heads and tails above that cesspool to the south: cincinnati. that place is so trashy we don't even consider it be part of the state. hell, even their airport is in kentucky!
7 of 9 | Posted by copygodd
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Posted on December 1, 2005 2:15 PM
hell, even their airport is in kentucky
I never did understand why that was the case.
8 of 9 | Posted by J Unit
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Posted on December 1, 2005 4:05 PM
for the same reason they arrested their museum curator.
9 of 9 | Posted by copygodd
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Posted on December 6, 2005 8:25 PM