POSTS TAGGED: Big Brother 14

Ian: “You know that sign at the end of a show that no animals were harmed making this production? They can’t do that – the fish died.” Oh Danielle, I understand! It’s almost over, only one more day and then what will we do? WHAT WILL WE DO? I have spent just as many days [...]

Shane: “I don’t want my fate in someone else’s hands.” Finally, over an hour after the Big Brother show ended on the East Coast, the live feeds came on and the 1st of the final HOH competition had already started. For the first time in 13 seasons, it did NOT start at the end of [...]

It’s time to whittle it down to the final three, and things finally get interesting.

Danielle: “I’m just making sure I don’t look like a hootch.” Sometimes things get overlooked when you are in a hurry! When Big Brother tells you that you have one hour to get ready and you are Danielle … well she has to get her make-up on!!! She asks Jenn to remind her to put [...]

The contestants play for HoH, and everyone but Dan continues being an idiot.

Hey hey BB fans!  As I’m sure you know, everyone interesting is gone.  And by everyone interesting, I mean Britney.  The rest of these boring sacks of yell-talk make me sleepy.    I miss your snark…   Last week Ian won the HoH, and after pretending like he might be smart enough to actually make a [...]

BB: “I realize English may be a difficult language to understand, but STOP still means STOP!” Old Mother Hubbard, or in this case, our Big Brother houseguests, went to the storeroom and all of their favorite foods and snacks were gone, even the BEER! It seems Big Brother thought they were getting a little FAT [...]

Frank about Ian: “I don’t trust that little fucker as far as I could throw him…. and I could probably throw him pretty far!” I feel exactly the same way Danielle! WTF is going on in the Big Brother House? Just when you think the dust has settled, something or someone stirs that pot, BUT [...]

Ian: “This house is turning me into an asshole.” What the hell has happened to Frank? Did Big Brother have their prom and play a cruel “Carrie” joke on him? You have no idea what has happened since Mike Boogie walked out that door on Thursday. It’s been crazy. That “Fast Forward” has continued. Ian [...]

Double elimination time! Things could get interesting. They could… But they don’t.

It’s time for the PoV competition. It involves counting, so at least half the house doesn’t stand a chance.

Hey guys! Last week’s backdoor eviction of Janelle was MIGHTY shocking, wasn’t it? It was so wonderful to see the new kids thinking for themselves and taking the veterans along for a ride the whole time. Now that one of the most popular Big Brother players of all time had been kicked out, what sort [...]

It’s eviction time! And a new HoH is crowned.

The power of veto competition is held, and some actual game play happens.

Shane to Danielle: “Do you know what a dork is? A whale’s penis…. just call me ‘Whale Penis’. “ The awkwardness of  Shanielle is reaching it’s breaking point. He confessed an intimate secret to her and she blew it off, demanding more “me” time or they could just forget the whole “showmance” thing. He told [...]

Frank: “I’m like the blocked kyrptonite. I don’t know what it is! I’m just lucky, I guess!” “Shanielle” are certain that America has fallen in love with them, They are the NEW Brenchel! They were considering the possibility of being the next Jeff & Jordan because of Danielle’s southern background, but it’s their competitive spirit [...]

Last week on Big Brother: the producers changed everything and blamed it on “America,” and now everything is bullshit. We resume during the HoH competition, in which all 12 contestants (UGH, I can’t believe how many are still left in this game) are hanging from a fake pirate ship as water is poured on their [...]

Danielle to Janelle: “I never thought you were so funny in my entire life! Well, in the whole month I’ve known you.” How can you not look at that outfit and think of Shane! I had to take a second look to make sure he wasn’t the model. The guy does have quite a package [...]

Are you ready for the dullest episode of the season? THAT’S THE SPIRIT! Listen: we have a lot of reasons to be down on the United States these days (people shoving fried chicken in their mouths to show how much they hate gays, a bumbling buffoon traveling around the world to represent us, the continued [...]

The Power of Veto involves clowns and not letting your balls drop

Britney: Why is Jenn mad? We haven’t even talked to her at all!” Oh wow, what did Britney and Boogie find in that crane machine and could it affect the game this Thursday? It’s a proven fact that every Big Brother twist comes to a conclusion on the 4th week. This Thursday is that day! [...]

Britney: “Just don’t touch his penis, just don’t…. it’s not going to be good.”  Danielle: “Britney, I have these strong urges to see what size it is!”  Britney: “Ok… then we can figure something out.” Yeah Baby! I don’t think you’re gonna see this on Big Brother this week. My pictures were even censored when [...]

Janelle: “Ian knows more about my season than I do!” Ian and Ashley have become quite close in the Big Brother house. They could be considered the new “showmance” of the season. It’s more believable than the one CBS is trying to make viewers think is going on between our new HOH Shane and Nurse [...]

The second POV competition is held

Britney to Ian: “If you were at home right now, you would hate half of this cast.” The casualties of war…. Now that Allison Grodner has escorted another Big Brother houseguest out to the parking lot at the CBS Studios, it’s back to “business as usual” in the house. It’s like Willie Hantz was never [...]

Shane: “My Mom told me vaginas have teeth in them. I couldn’t make that up! I didn’t lose my virginity til I was 21.” There was something going on in the Big Brother house last night… something that hasn’t happened in the 14 days I’ve been watching the live feeds. It’s a first for these [...]

Frank about Willie: “When I see somebody’s becoming a social pariah, I feel kinda bad for him – doesn’t mean I’m not gonna put him up.” “I said I came here to cook for the others and that’s just what I’m doing. I’m stirring the pot and creating havoc every chance I get. Then I [...]