POSTS TAGGED: bravo

Thursday, January 12th Rob (CBS, 8:30 pm) Rob (Rob Schneider) meets his new wife’s large Mexican-American family for the first time and notices he doesn’t quite fit in. This Rob Schneider vehicle will last exactly as long as it takes NBC to realize that reruns of Two and a Half Men get better ratings. Project [...]

Must watch!

The Beverly Jillbillies??

Two words: Restaurant Whores!

Whoever owns rights to The Women should totally sue this sad excuse for a salon. Also, there’s a drunk and it’s not Sandra Lee (surprise!)

Wednesday, Jan. 11 One Tree Hill (CW, 8 pm) Clay and Quinn encounter a mysterious problem. No matter what they try, their DVR just will not tape the Venture Bros. Nature (PBS, 8 pm) Street-smart kangaroos move into Australia’s capital city. “Clean and sober. Have a mate and joeys. Anything helps. God bless!” Suburgatory (ABC, [...]

Thanks for proving once again that fat people are whiny lazyasses…

Number three?

Kyle stirs eggs in Hawaii.

Tuesday, Jan. 10 Oh great. Now they have to go to the bathroom. Texas Multi Mamas (WE, 8 pm) Casey takes her quads on a road trip. Remember your helmet! Work It (ABC, 8:30 pm) When the guys make their first attempts at sales, they are surprised to discover that Lee’s experience is no competition [...]

Not positive

Kathy has a new talk show!

Monday, Jan. 9 The Bachelor (ABC, 8 pm) Twelve bachelorettes try out for a community theater production written by children. That’s totally meta, considering that the Bachelor’s story arcs are written for children. Antiques Roadshow (PBS, 8 pm) A 1960 first edition copy of “To Kill a Mockingbird”; collection of bronzes; rare 1924 Gibson F-5 [...]

Saturday, Jan. 7 My Cat From Hell (Animal Planet, 8 pm) A cat named Kleo keeps Tim from proposing to his girlfriend. Kleo has no opposable thumbs. How much control over Tim can she possibly have? Cops (Fox, 8 pm) A homeless man refuses to leave the handicap stall in a store bathroom. Who can [...]

Friday, Jan. 6 E! News! (E!, 7 pm) A team of reporters cover television, film and music, as well as the celebrity party scene. Is Jessica Biel pregnant? Is Justin Timberlake the father? Aren’t Ryan Seacrest’s teeth shiny tonight? Extreme Makeover: Home Edition (ABC, 8 pm) Ty and the team head to Iowa to help [...]

We find out how much fun it is to cook with chemicals, and then everyone goes to HELL!

Just like us!

Thursday, Jan. 5 What’s spellcheck ever done for me? Toddlers & Tiaras (TLC, 6 pm) Large prizes draw contestants to the America’s Trezured Dollz pageant in Nashville, Tenn. Candice? Are you sure you spelled the name of that pageant right? Project Runway All Stars (Lifetime, 9 pm) Guest judges include famed fashionista Miss Piggy and [...]

Could it be true?

Wednesday, Jan. 4 Deep well of undirected anger. Hardball with Chris Matthews (MSNBC, 5 pm) Political analyst Chris Matthews talks about a wide range of issues and asks hard questions of politicians, pundits and other guests. Chris, ask Congress the question we all want answered: “WHAT THE @#!%! DO YOU FUCKWAFFLES THINK YOU’RE DOING??” The [...]

Some video fun with the Housewives

The cast ditches Twitch and Failor for Hawaii and Ken gets some.

Tuesday, Jan. 2 Celebrity Wife Swap (ABC, 9 pm) Gayle Haggard, wife of former TV evangelist Ted Haggard, trades lives with Steffanie Sampson, who is engaged to actor Gary Busey and rejects organized religion. After experiencing Gary Busey lovin’, Gayle refuses to swap back. Rooint! Work It (ABC, 8:30 pm) When unemployed best friends Lee [...]

What happens in Vegas…

Monday, Jan. 2nd Hold on. Just let me get rid of this bimbo… The Bachelor (ABC, 8 pm) Ben Flajnik returns to the mansion for the season’s first cocktail party; a septuagenarian confesses her love for Ben; a bachelorette shows up at the mansion on a horse. Ben and Levi the horse have been spotted [...]

Sat., Dec. 31 Strange Sex: The Year’s Best (TLC, 8 pm) The top-10 strangest sex stories impart the strangest, most-unusual instances of relationships and sexual practices. Freak babies, freak families, freak brides, freak sex. Go “impart” your freaks somewhere else, TLC. The Bourne Ultimatum (CBS, 8:30 pm) Jason Bourne continues his international quest to uncover [...]

Friday, Dec. 30th The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe (ABC, 8 pm) Children join forces with the lion mystic Aslan to free the land of Narnia from the White Witch’s wintry spell. Based on the novel by C.S. Lewis. Pevensie has got to be the most unlikely last name ever. Need to Know (PBS, [...]

Twitter takes over and then Patti LaBelle finds BigFoot!

Wednesday, Dec. 28th Dr. Phil (Own, 8 pm) A woman leaves her husband for another man and now lives in a tent; a woman learns her husband was living a secret life for almost a year. For the last 12 months, he was known at the TGI Friday’s as “Eduardo.” Modern Family (ABC, 9 pm) [...]

Tuesday, Dec. 27 Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory (ABC Family, 6 pm) A poor boy and his grandfather win a tour through the marvelous factory of a wily confectioner. The good version. Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory (ABC Family, 6 pm) A poor boy and four spoiled children win a tour through the [...]

Monday, Dec. 26 Rudolph’s Shiny New Year (ABC, 8 pm) Rudolph the reindeer comes to the rescue when an evil bird kidnaps the New Year baby. Arthur Rankin and Jules Bass occasionally sought inspiration in drugs. Sometimes you get Heat Miser. Sometimes, you get… this. You Deserve It (CBS, 9 pm) Contestants try to solve [...]

Saturday, Dec. 24 Rocky II (Versus, 5 pm) Underdog Philadelphia fighter Rocky Balboa gets another shot at heavyweight champ Apollo Creed. Sports Reporter: “Hey, Rock! Doya think ya got brain damage?” Rocky: “I don’t see any.” All the Best, All the Worst of 2011 (CNN, 7 pm) 2011 in politics, pop culture, the economy and [...]

Friday, Dec 23rd SpongeBob Squarepants (Nik, 7 pm) SpongeBob receives an invitation to take part in a competition on Karate Island. Sweep the leg, Spongebob. Earth 2050: The Future of Energy (Green Planet, 7 pm) In the year 2050, with a booming population in dire need of energy, how will we adapt? We won’t. Fossil [...]

The cast gather with Wendy Williams for a discussion of the season. Zygote maintains his Biggest Ass in Dallas title. Chore is vindicated.

Gitchy-gitchy ya-ya Tom-Tom!

Thursday, Dec. 22 The Situation Room with Wolf Blitzer (CNN, 4 pm) Traditional reporting and online resources update international news. “Online sources” = Wikileaks. Big Shrimpin’ (Discovery 7 pm) Barbara blocks in the Hannah at the dock; Miss Ashleigh gets a head start on fishing; Roundhead runs into trouble when a leaky bag shows negligence [...]

Wednesday, Dec 21 Erin Burnett Out Front (CNN, 7 pm) The former CNBC anchor heads her own hour-long general news program. I totally watch this for the news. A Home for the Holidays with Martina McBride (CBS 8 pm) Celebrities present inspirational stories of adoption; musical performers include Justin Bieber, Mary J. Blige, Gavin DeGraw [...]

Time to get wasted on tequila and have a meltdown!

Synchronized Swim!!!

Kathy Griffin’s new stand-up special, Tired Hooker, airs tonight at 10PM. Bravo released these preview clips, so I thought I’d pass them along… Here’s a little used condom humor to get your through your Tuesday: Kathy on Kim Kardashian: