POSTS TAGGED: funny

Howdy there Gasmi! After last weeks recap show I am back and anxious to dive right in to this new episode. Not really, I actually have the flu and sitting up and typing makes me want to cry but thats just how much I love you guys. Let me crack open a new case of [...]

This time on The Shitty: The gang heads to Miami, where Jay runs into an ex, causing tension (mild tension) with Whitney; Allie acts unstable like always and she and Adam come to an impasse; and Olivia isn’t in this episode at all! Mwahahahahaha! Kiss!

And here’s the proof. Where to begin? This episode started out normal enough, or as normal as a show about drag queens can be. More bitchiness, more ego fueled blather from our showgirl, Shannel and plenty of fabulous hair and makeup. Then it took a turn into “oh no!” unexpectedness. We had a reference to [...]

The cliffhanger from last week’s Making the Band was whether or not Danity Kane would give it another try. I have a feeling that this will be the cliffhanger at the end of every episode for the rest of this season and for many seasons to come.

Gasmii, what can I say? This week’s Toddlers & Tiara’s pageant is the Chitlin’ Strut and I actually had to pay $2 to download this heinousness from iTunes to get some pictures for you, that is just how much I love you. What they don’t picture are the actual chitlins, which according to Wikipedia are [...]

Dear Gasmi, If this season is anything like last season there’s going to be parties and fights, gay husbands and bargain basement royalty, wannabe socialhos and wannabe strait husbands all competing for approval and adulation in the public eye. That would be us, Gasmi. Am I ready to adulate? Hell no, this is the Gasm, [...]

This week on I Love Money 2, the cast turns up the heat! That’s judging by Saaphyri’s face, at least, because I can’t find any other excuse for this look.

Coke busts and dirty tradings and hookers, oh my! Plus, lots and lots of Uncle Pete until, well, you know… Back off, senile. Becker wasn’t nominated.

This week on Lost, Jack gets Sunday-schooled, the Oceanic 6 leave on a jet plane, and Locke gets a new pair of kicks.

This week on Hell’s Kitchen, the gang takes a field trip, learn some life lessons about meat and where our food comes from, and we get to enjoy the juicy squishy sounds of vomit. Hope you have those barf bags ready Gasmii!!

Tonight on American Idol, Carly Smithson does a Delta Burke when she was thin impression and Tatiana has a seizure. Cooooooooonsuela!

Dear Gasmi, It’s finally here, the last full episode of the Orange County housewives. I’ve got my aerodynamic comfort foods and my dirty martini (shouts out to njgasmfan) and I’m ready to go. Here’s to the hos who’ve taken time off from their busy schedules to invade our lives for thirteen weeks. May they forever [...]

I Know I Am, But What Are You? Howard Fine, Acting Coach and Asshole Dear Gasmii, Welcome once again to “Confessions of a Teen Idol”. This week we’re treated to a major beat down of one Idol, a big change in another Idol and the specter of one of our Idols in a Speedo swimsuit. [...]

Welcome back to the Real World Brooklyn! I could write a nice, opening paragraph about my thoughts on the week’s episode…or I could just copy mine and Flippy’s emails about it: ChickBomb: you know I actually liked the rw this week! It was still dumb as hell but I kinda liked it! Flippy: good! it’s [...]

First off, what’s up with those new Fox promos? You know the ones I mean: “SO MYSTERIOUS!” “SO PROVOCATIVE!” “SO MEATY!” OK, that last one’s from The Soup, but anyway. Fox is tacky enough already without giving every show the GoDaddy treatment. (Speaking of which, if any two things do NOT belong together, it’s domain [...]

This week on Top Chef, a midget tried to bang a big girl and we found out that Fabio’s way gayer than we could have ever imagined.

“I am all kinds of confused.” Hello beloved fans of The Bachelor! As you may or may not know, this last week some rumors started circulating on the interweb involving a Bachelor scandal of epic proportions. I have no idea if the rumors are true and I have no idea if I care if the [...]

This week on Desperate Housewives: Orson is pissed that Andrew makes more than he does; Susan goes ape-shit regarding MJ spending time with Katherine because, let’s face it, she’s a better mother (barring the whole daughter-getting-crushed-by-furniture thing); Lynette and Tom fight about money (shocking!); and Gabby and Carlos find out about a secret. And Edie [...]

Up next on The Shitty: Adam and Allie are psycho and want Jay to move out so they can live together and keep being psycho; Erin and Duncan sort of break-up; Whitney insults Olivia to her face and it is awesome; Olivia wants Nevan to move out; and Jay has a serious (kind of) question [...]

Previously on Brothers and Sisters: Ryan Lafferty (Walker) made his first appearance, but ABC doesn’t think you need to know that, because there are once again no previouslies. Lazy network monkeys. Do I dazzle you? Walker Manse. Nora is going out of town, telling Saul that she’s going to tour another facility for research for [...]

This week on Grey’s Anatomy, the show starts out with a serious tone as Addison Montgomery makes her way back to Seattle Grace. When the ambulance arrives The Chief and Derek meet it with hugs for Addison and the woman she’s with. They wheel in Addy’s brother as Addison tells Derek that he was fine [...]

Tonight, American Idol gets off to a really painful start and Ted Danson is still alive.

Gross! Ugly Betty begins with Elena pouring pomegranate seeds into a blender, mixing, and pouring into glasses. Wouldn’t it be easier just to buy a bottle of POM? Probably cheaper in the long run, and definitely faster than pulling those damn seeds out of the fruit in the first place. Ugly Betty, why must you [...]

Oh my goodness and holy ornamentation with a big dollop of outrageous shenanigans and drag mishaps 101. I think I screamed and whooped several times while watching this and my boyfriend looked at me like I was riding the Anne Heche/Margot Kidder looney train, which maybe I am. Every once in a while when I [...]

So I really wasn’t sure whether or not I wanted to recap yet another season of Making the Band. I just didn’t know if anyone was still paying attention to all of that faux drama anymore. But then Flipit kept sending me season previews, and I just knew that I had to get back in [...]

Hooray! The start of another fantastic season of Amazing Race! I just peed myself in 12 different languages I’m so excited! For those of you who want a rundown of the teams – check out my previous recap for all the goods. Let’s jump right into it now! We start off with a shot of [...]

Sweet, merciful, crap! Just when you think it can’t get any worse, they whip out false teeth for kids to get them through those awful Tooth Fairy years! But I’m getting ahead of myself, so let’s back up. Yep, that looks about right. I almost deleted this episode from my DVR because it was about [...]

Yeah, she is endlessly screencappable.

This week on Lost, Jin learns French, Sun receives some unsettling news, and Locke gets to make another sacrifice to the Island.

This week on I Love Money 2, the crazy get crazier! Similarly, the horny get hornier. On VH1, those things are often one and the same.

Welcome back to another drama filled episode of the Real World Brooklyn! This week, Baya and Ryan finally make out, Chet and JD have a heart to heart and Chet might be gay, Katelynn and Baya fight over a guy, Sarah has bulimia and Scotty’s on roids. Well, either all that stuff happened, or the [...]

Don’t forget the tongue, Jason. Are you all ready for the Hometown Dates on The Bachelor? As a special Valentine’s Day present to you all, this recap is extremely tardy. You’re welcome.

Frobisher’s baaaaack!! And he’s more of a wuss than ever!

Dear Gasmi, This week I learned that blue cheese stuffed olives in dirty martinis are definitely the way to go. Yay vodka!! Other than that, Vicki starts her own cult, Lynne plays with her husband’s pole, Jeana discovers homeless people, Gretchen finally takes a vacation, and Tamra gets to reach the pinnacle of her dramatic [...]

In the great tradition of spoiled rotten brats on television, TVGasm brings you this week’s episode “Veruca Salt”. Starring our very own Veruca Salt hopeful, Jeremy (I’m dope, not I’m a dope) Jackson. Whooo hooo. I want it NOWWWWWWW!!!! In our country we embrace and applaud such self-absorbed brats and even praise them for their [...]

Welcome back kids! bBitz is back and it’s time once again to remember that 11 random couples + The World + 1 Million Dollars – adequate sleep + Phil = THE AMAZING RACE (and comic gold)! This season looks to be the most exciting one yet! They’ve shortened the amount of time on the race [...]

Tonight on American Idol, the season officially went off it’s fucking rocker.

Tonight on Desperate Housewives: Money money money money. Money! Susan wants M.J. to go to a private school; Gabby wants to slim down; Tom finds out about Dave’s lies; Lynette gets a loan from Bree; and the countdown to a non-Sheridan DH has begun. Boo! Not OK!

Welcome back to the Rock of Love Bus! There’s no doubt about the life lessons learned from Rock of Love, and this week we learn a big one about dressing trashy that I was happily able to apply to my own life. Man I wish I brought a book. Me too.