POSTS TAGGED: recap

Dear Gasmi, It’s finally here. We’ve laughed, we’ve cried, and we’ve even gagged a few times. My liquor cabinet is looking a little depleted and I need baby oil to fit into my jeans. It’s been a truly awesome season. May the magic continue…*sniff* But before I get all teary eyed, there’s a finale to [...]

Completely going amnesiac about last week’s events this week, Schraeger and Walsh attempt to help one of their own who blacked out during a raging bender and might have killed someone.

This week on Gossip Girl the kids take on a scandal that’s bigger than their bank accounts, Chuck makes serious faces, and Lily gets weird for no reason.

O.Snapp is on vacation this week, so please welcome your sub Hills recapper, Monamonzano! Back to something important- ME! This week, the ramifications of the “Boys” Hawaiian vacation erupts in monumental, melodramatic, man-coholic and often melancholic douchebaggery, Heidi and Spence keep seeing the therapist after another run-in with Stace-face, and Blahdrina gets torn a couple [...]

Tonight on American Idol Results, Daughtry’s still a midge, Gwen takes an aerobics class, and Paula is still too old to be crawling on the floor in a bustier on national television. When in Doubt, multi-task.

Hi-hi once again to all you Ty-Ty fans! Let me start out by making a heartfelt apology to everybody for all the exposed chubby manflesh (i.e. hairy tits) in last week’s recap… after ten weeks of watching women who need USA For Africa far more desperately than Africa does, I got a little carried away [...]

Hello! Nope this show hasn’t ended yet. Just a few more eps and maybe then I’ll feel clean again. I doubt it, but who cares anyway because we are all going to die. Sorry, that’s just my cute little way of getting myself amped up to recap Keeping Up With The Kardashians! Why does every [...]

“THIS is for that BIRDHOUSE KIT I got for CHRISTMAS instead of the MILLENIUM FALCON!” I had a great time watching this episode up until the last couple of minutes, at which point I was like “Nooooo, we already did this! Exactly this!” They only have 3 more episodes to write their way out of [...]

Previously on Ugly Betty, which was like decades ago, the Meades lost their money through embezzlement and not through gambling and hookers as expected, Papi almost died but now that storyline is dead, and Betty decided the threat of AIDS, syphilis, gonorrhea, chlamydia, the herp, and hairy genital warts was no match for her horniness [...]

Tonight on Desperate Housewives: Bree goes to Karl for divorce help; Susan gets a surprise when someone who sucks from her past comes back; Dave’s revenge plans keep happening at the pace of a drunk snail; Katherine and Mike talk real love; Tom and Lynette are the exact same people they’ve been for the past [...]

Tonight on American Idol, Church Lady screams like the Wicked Witch in the rain and Paula doesn’t do drugs. Booooo! Have you seen my puppy little girl?

Another episode, another huge bill owed to the liquor store that is supplying the booze for these bozos. How I wish I owned the place that was lucky enough to sponsor the drinking on this show, I’d be on my fifth massage at the Four Seasons by now. Somewhere there’s a PCP dealer planning his [...]

This week on 90210, actors and writers alike quickly spiral into the depths of inadequacy. Hey Shenae, how does it feel to have peaked at 16?

Last week we learned the Chinese need to learn English so that Americans can win a million dollars easier, Cara can beat Michael Phelps any day (provided she doesn’t continue to swim like a sea cow) and the leg of the race is never over until Phil says so! Why? Cause it’s his mo-fo house [...]

Author’s Note: My internet decided to hate me this week, and wouldn’t work long enough for me to get this posted. Sorry for the delay, folks! I just read an interview with Ms. Sarah Jane Morris, where she said that when she saw that the episode was titled “Julia,” she got nervous. I was, too, [...]

Gasmii Gasmii Gasmii– Harper’s Island may have been banished from CBS‘s Thursday schedule for cancellation-adjacent Saturday night, but it’s still #1 in the demo’s of Our Hearts. Yeah, right. I, Leia LaBiblia, your recap artist, am starting to feel like one of the two-dimensional human targets on this show. With ratings like this thing’s been [...]

This week on The Cougar, Stacey says she will be separating the boys from the men. Clearly Stacey has not evaluated the group of guys she’s assembled here. There’s a 9:3 men to boys ratio in this group. The only way she can determine these guys’ manliness is through a talent show. You can so [...]

This week on I Love Money 2, people can’t stop talking about boobs! I don’t know how this is different from any other episode, but it’s still worth mentioning.

This week on Lost, Widmore becomes twice the deadbeat dad he already was, Eloise misplaces her maternal instinct in the jungle, some hippies have a shoot-em-up, and Daniel fulfills his destiny.

Aside from the “3AM” reference and Rob Thomas being a textbook example of “GayFace”, this image is perfect because of the Ginger band member…he’s TOTALLY checking out Rob’s ass! Hey Gasmii! It’s 3AM in 24 World…but nobody’s lonely! They’re all too busy participating in the gayest episode ever! Shirtless men, check! Dudes sharing a bed, [...]

This week on Hell’s Kitchen…… WOO!! She’s gone where the goblins go, below, below, below, yo ho, let’s open up and sing and ring the bells out. Okay, so I’m getting a little ahead of myself here, but you’re all going to have to deal with it. Mmmkay?

Last week we learned that there’s no end to Jaime’s horrific-ness, Lil Guys came up a lil short in the end and oh yeah – all hell broke loose in the biggest fight on the show ever. Ladies and Gents, it’s now time to learn that life can be a bitch – especially if it’s [...]

BSG’s Helo teams up with a pothead and finally finds the Dollhouse, Dominic returns (sorta), a little girl loves knives, and Alpha finally shows up!

So this season of Making the Band is officially over. And like every other season, we end with an unsatisfying reunion episode where very few questions are actually answered, and my iced double mocha runs out far too quickly. Final Chapter…until next season…

W’sup girls’n’boys? Welcome back to Brazil, home of elite fashion designers, thick accents and zero labia hair, and I have some pressing questions for you all. Have you ever wondered what some of these girls would look like wearing a doily and some dental floss? Would you be interested in watching Sex-God Nigel Barker making [...]

Well ladies and gents, this is how it all ends. The cast of For the Love of Ray J, I’m gonna be presumptuous and say “season one”, has gathered to recap the season, update us on all their comings and goings and provide closure to those of us who have nothing better to do. A [...]

Last time on the Duel: Brooke went home in the sissiest Duel ever, Evan pouted and acted like a pussy, Mark was old, TJ was monotonous and boring and the opening still sucked. We start this episode with Evan giving a long monologue…about sheep? Um, ok. He says something about how “chicks dig a winner” [...]

Intensity. Drama. White people doing runs. Judges using the word “brilliant” way too much. Jamie Foxx saying things like “five people who shocked the world” and “throat Olympics “. Choir directors who look like lesbians with glued on chin hair. This. Is the end of the world. And THIS. Is American Idol Results!

What is that stench? Who’s ready for another two hours of Celebrity Apprentice? This week is all about body odor, which naturally these beautiful people know nothing about. What’s a poor celebrity to do?

This week on 90210, everyone just kind of phones it in. I miss “us”.

This week, Cole’s secret past comes back to haunt him in the present with real consequences for all The Unusuals.

This week on Grey’s Anatomy, Izzie takes the “I’m fine, really!” line one step too far, a sexy bromance is rekindled, Lexie cleans out craft services and the producers pull out all the stops to make sure the audience is in tears by the end of the episode. Oh, and Meredith accomplishes a feat I [...]

Guess what folks? This show is still on the air. My deepest sympathies. On the other hand, what the hell else have I got to do? Let’s see what this fun filled family is up to this week on Keeping Up With The Kardashians!

LINC SCARED OF MAN WITH GUN! LINC HOLD BRAINS IN HEAD! Well, things are moving right along here in Miami! Team Michael and Team Linc are totally mad at each other, but their separate sleuthing adventures lead them to the same place at the same time for an anticlimactic whispery showdown. Those fake passes they [...]

Tonight on Desperate Housewives: As the season winds down, the show becomes less and less interesting. Orson lies; Carlos sees Lynette naked; Gabby and Tom argue; and Susan reveals a dark secret to Dave. I’m bored. Me too.

This week on Gossip Girl ,everyone starts talking about butter, someone turns out not to be an angel, and Jesus makes an appearance.

There are five Cylons. But who are they? And should they be allowed to breed with humans? And why does the AI stage look like the Into the Woods set? Join me as we watch the final five visit the graves of the Rat Pack and stomp on them as hard as they can. This. [...]

It’s been a whole month, kids, and I’ve missed each and every one of you! We’ve been through a homoerotic jizz fest and drag queens together and now it’s time for a show that is centered around a real girl! Well, if you don’t count her lips, nose or boobs. Brett Michaels passed on this???

It was a level-4 week on The Hills, as the girls crash the Brocation, Blahdrina hypnotizes Broday by swinging her tits in front of him, and Spencer and Heidi (thankfully) spend less time talking about therapy and more time talking about something you never thought they would: virginity. “You’re getting verrrrry horny…”

I spent the weekend in NYC with my hubby. I was hoping to run into a Real Worlder (or at least Kelly Bensimon running in traffic) in the Big Apple, but alas, Lady Luck was not on my side. However, I did see Neil Patrick Harris, which I am now reminiscing about while drinking wine, [...]