POSTS TAGGED: Satire

Wherein everyone gets paid, but only one gets to play Mortal Kombat whilst rapping in Portuguese.

Nick is taking Ryan to see that band that is going to invade Pat’s house, poop in his toilet, eat all of his cheese food products, and sleep with his gerbil

The morning starts with these twits staring out the window at a lizard. If you find that odd, Rocky is outside up a tree. And asking for a beer from Bluto. Bluto starts to climb the tree, Rocky burps and throws her empty beer can on the ground and Bluto hilariously falls out of the [...]

I see London, I hear TMI about these girls’ lady parts.

No ho is safe with Kim on the kase!

Voir les femmes stupides.

For a few blissful seconds, it was like Cribs.

Nothing happens in this ep. NOTHING.

Bruce Jenner shows up, making Penelope the 3rd biggest baby on the show, at least.

Don’t sing Bruno Mars. Bruno Mars can barely sing Bruno Mars.

Hello Gasmites! This week we start off where we left off last week. With Janae’s drunk ass getting her ass beat. The last thing we saw, Nikki and Valentina had Janae by the hair on the floor. Valentina just keeps whopping the shit out of Janeae’s head as Janae keeps yelling no no no no. [...]

(This week on Dear TvGasm we have our 1st annual Christmas Party where we invited all the fake celebrities who didn’t really ask us for advice during the year to ring in the Holidays in the most fictitious way possible.  This year all refreshments are courtesy of the Franzia that Flipit stole out of his mom’s garage. ) [...]

Project Runway All Stars comes back this week, so it’s time to re-post the preview ReDub! Enjoy, and come back for MrsMiaWallace’s hilary recaps! Were they not needy and whiny and desperate enough the first time around? Then you’re in luck cuz they’re baaaaaaack!!! I love making fun of a lot of things, but Project [...]

It’s the season finale of Mob Wives: Chicago, this should prove to be exciting.  But, it absolutely doesn’t. The Bobbsey twins are hanging out at Renee’s apartment to discuss the “chat” with Nora and Pia.  Pia claims that Nora is not a thought in her mind anymore.  Oh, does that mean that she’s not going [...]

It’s the morning of the Breast Cancer Walk and Leah is waiting for the girls to show up.  Renee and Pia are there first and I’m very happy to see Renee there.  I would have to hate her if she didn’t come just because of Nora.  C-Wow and Nora are running late and show up [...]

We start out with confrontation time between Giana and Renee.  Giana says that each of her parents have two completely different stories about her childhood and her father’s involvement in it.  Renee says she never once called the cops when Giana’s father showed up to see her.  Instead, her father never tried to show up [...]

Welcome to the latest installment of the semi-connected women of Mob Wives Chicago! We find out that the charity event of this season will be the breast cancer walk in honor of Leah’s mom.  At least this is legitimate and not some random charity where the drama can reach its peak.  I mean, the drama [...]

I am so happy to announce that this week, Leah’s hair looks the best it’s ever looked on the “live” footage.  I’m a huge fan of curly hair and love to see someone embrace their natural curls and allow their curls to realize their full potential.  We rehash the fight from last week and I [...]

Finally, the answer we’ve all been waiting for… What makes Russell’s dick hard??

The Viacom and DirecTV fiasco will not keep me down, y’all!  I had to buy this episode from iTunes, so it had better be good.  I want my $2.99 worth.  Anyway, if you have DirecTV and didn’t get to see this episode, I’ve got it all right here.  Taking the bullet for the rest of [...]

Well, this was a short, relatively uncomplicated episode. It happened to make for mediocre tv, but it’s great for me as a recapper! Heigh ho! Russell Hunt/Boring Politics At the end of last week’s episode, millions (dozens?) of Alsookie Stackheaux shippers were thrilled as the two FINALLY appeared to be getting it on. This week, [...]

At Nora’s apartment, Nora and Pia discuss the most recent bar fight.  Nora still avoids letting Pia know what she said about Renee’s custody battle.  She’s only got one friend left, so I guess that’s a good idea.  So, she tells Pia that she took a swing at Renee and then said, “I swing at [...]

 This week brings us more screwed up American colloquialisms and sleepy drama.  I warn you, if you haven’t watched this episode, it was incredibly boring up until the last 5 minutes. We start out with Renee, Nora, and Julie.  Hopefully, Julie isn’t wearing one of Renee’s tops she loaned Nora or else the shit’s gonna [...]

Bwahh! Why do I always pick the shows with a bajillion plot lines going on? Oh yes, I pick shows based on male nudity percentage, not ease-of-recap. Well, I certainly got enough man parts this week, so I guess all is forgiven. Anyway. Whew! There’s a lot of seemingly unrelated plot lines. How do these [...]

Last week on Loosely-Connected Women of Chicago, FACEBOOK UNFRIENDING became the Mob Wives Chicago THE CHRISTENING and Renee had a straight-up breakdown over the possible custody loss of her youngest daughter (which had me feeling bad for her until this episode). Leah and Christina meet up for coffee.  Christina tells Leah that she met up [...]

Like Farrah, but way sadder and less bratty.

There is freedom within, there is freedom without…

Little Audrey’s mommy, daddy and auntie have some issues.

I have no words that are not curses.

Labor can’t suck as much as these eps did.

As I live and breathe, a babydaddy who is a real man.

Myranda and Eric learn how to take care of a baby in spite of themselves.

In which flying diarrhea gets the war flowing again.

OMGEEEZ I’m so excited! I’m watching TV or a real TV and it looks soooo good! And my recaps gonna be posted at a reasonable time! Previously… look at my recap, cause I just posted it on Saturday. Heads in saddlebags, gross sex, betrayal, imprisonment, dead children and so forth. Dude, the map looks so [...]

The most drinking-game-ready episode yet.

Ever want to gut-punch that little shit at the office?

I wouldn’t wish this crap on these asshats or my worst enemies. Except the puzzles.

Previously on Grimm! That’s right, we’ve got enough plot threads in play to get a “Previously on Grimm” reminder at the start of this episode. To jog our collective memories, we’re reminded of the fact that a refrigerator repair-beaver wigged out when he found out that Nick is a Grimm: We’re also reminded that this [...]

It’s like “Hostel”…if “Hostel” were rated PG-13

This week on Glee we learn a LOT of lessons. Too many, actually.