POSTS TAGGED: spoof

Previously on I Love Money, Rodeo rode on home and we found out there are no more teams. No more teams?! How will we ever cope? Find out after the jump!

Tonight on Big Brother, I thought I missed the double elimination because of the stupid election coverage running late and got really really mad and ate half a pizza and then BB came on after all and I felt really guilty and vowed to start dieting again tomorrow. Thankfully, I wasn’t wearing my cross when [...]

This week on Project Runway, I’m older and more spiritual. So suck it. Sebelia cheated. Now on with the judging!

“Welcome to my sexy vat of crap!” Welcome, one and all, to another episode of Date My Ex. To those of you out there with the amazing stamina it must take to keep tuning in to read about Jo De La Rosa as if she were the least bit important, I thank you heartily. As [...]

“Steady…. don’t make me laugh! Dead puppies. Baseball. The Montauk Monster.” I’m not sure if MTV is still promoting that whole “Rock The Vote” campaign, but if they are they’re doing a very bad job of it (I’m looking at you, Diddy). That’s because last night, as Michelle Obama and Ted Kennedy were giving their [...]

Previously on Big Brother I was accused of gaying up my recaps too much. I have no plans on stopping.

After spending last week’s episode visiting every radio station on the east coast, Shwayze and the boyz are back in home town L.A. And we join them this week as they make yet another radio station appearance. They’re promoting their upcoming performance at Wango Tango, a giant concert with a catchy name.

This week on Big Brother, Dan takes his “suck hard” strategy to an entirely new sucktacular high. I can’t hear you. Suck louder.

On this episode of Million Dollar Listing: Chad and Victoria are celebrating their one-year anniversary and he has a surprise for her. Madison hires a new assistant and goes on a blind date. Trust Fund (nee Josh Flagg) breaks the law, and no one’s surprised. Some houses are sold, some houses are not, and I [...]

Greetings, gasmii! I’m finding that I worry every week that I Love Money is going to lose its gusto along the way, that maybe this week won’t be as terribly good. What the hell would we do then, right? Not to worry though, every week I’m completely delighted that this show will never run out [...]

Helloooooooo GASMII! I am back from my one-month long vacation that moved so quickly that it felt like it was gone in an MMMBop! And guess who else is back? Diddy and the gang AND a very special guest who just happens to be an extremely dramatic and partly evil choreographer. Any guesses on that [...]

“Slade has two swimming pools?” So this week a family member of mine set the DVR to record the Olympics EVERY TIME it was on. This of course, means that the Olympics were recording for at least 12 hours every day and the DVR started eliminating everything else that was recorded, most alarmingly, Date My [...]

Hey Gasmii, on this week’s NEW YORK GOES TO HOLLYWOOD, New York experiences a flavor of the far east in her first commercial shoot. She’s shooting a Japanese spec commercial, and in order to gain a better understanding of a foreign culture she indulges in stereotypical research – for example, going to a dry cleaner, [...]

This week on Project Runway, big girls cry. Well, one does. Zebra print hurts us all, Pleath.

Previously on Big Brother, Renny got a little private time in the HOH room so she could really let her hair down. Smooth sailin’ some days, sometimes just a kick in the rear. But she’s here!

Hey everybody! So how about that Michael Phelps character? It’s pretty impressive what he did, right? You know what else is impressive? The entire length of his races were interesting, even exciting. I’m pretty sure that nothing in the entire length of Pam: Girl on the Loose is going to be remotely as interesting as [...]

Do you have any friends or coworkers who take way too much time to tell a story? They really only need about 40 seconds for set up and punchline, but some how they drag the tale on until your eyes glaze over and your mind wanders to thoughts of grocery lists and bills to pay. [...]

Welcome back all ye ever-faithful Gasmii who read these insanely long recaps that fly forth from the limp-wristed hands of El Chubbo Homo known as J-Mo. It is so hard to believe that it’s been an entire two months since we began this journey together and watching the fabulously exciting and dramatic Shear Genius on [...]

Well, here we are once again, and I managed to out-write the publishing platform! No matter, I’m getting better at this all the time… when we last left off with our stylestants, they were getting ridiculously drunk and impersonating the previous loozahs of the season (and Bitchy Charlie’s Nekisa impression was to die for!) …honey, [...]

We’re back for another week of I Love Money! I love this show for so very many reasons, but one of the main reasons is that it feels never-ending in a totally good way. These are the reality TV all-stars, they don’t have to give us any of their time! But we’ve got them for [...]

***Letter from the Editor: I received some reader requests for this show, and once I sat down to watch it I couldn’t believe that I needed a few emails to wake my ass up to the situation. I called up Hypnotoad, America’s Most Smartest Model recapper, and dragged him out of retirement. I assigned him [...]

“My old folks home, my rules!” We are back this evening with Round Four of the dreaded Date My Ex. Blonde Bangs takes us through another painful recap going all the way back to when the girls cooked up this whole silly scheme in the first place. We continue through to Jo inviting Zack to [...]

Previously on Big Brother ,Michelle took control and went crazy with vengeance! “This if fah yew, Jessie!”

Hey Gasmii, Last week on New York Goes to Hollywood, New York had her heart broken once again, but instead of Flavor Flav, it was a crew of managers who crushed her soul. After seeing a performance and hitting up the food station/bar, they didn’t have the patience to wait for New York and took [...]

This week on Project Runway, there are actually projects that don’t suck on the runway. Will the rest of the season be teamwork challenges? You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it not act like an asshole.

Dear Crabby, The Baby Borrowers is over. Where can I get my fix? -Couch Ass Groove Dear Couch, Probably the nearest high school. However, why not consider the awkwardly edited Lessons Learned: The Baby Borrowers? Let’s agree to disagree like the boneheads on this show, except for the ones who are wrong, which is everyone [...]

On this glorious Sunday’s Big Brother, there’s a lot of yelling and screaming and really, really poor English. GlamourShot

As someone who isn’t particularly a wizard with money, I maybe shouldn’t criticize the boyz of Buzzin’ for managing to screw the cash pooch two weeks in a row. But I just can’t help myself. This week, Warren loses and envelope filled with $5000. We’ve all done that before, right?!

***Letter From the Editor:ChickBomb’s real life has taken over and become too busy, so please give a warm round of applause to your new I Love Money recapper, BaileyQuarters!! Greetings, Gasmii! Faithful readers of the I Love Money recaps know this is ChickBomb’s territory, but since she needed to take a break for a bit, [...]

Good evening dearest gasmii, and welcome to another episode of the possibly-well-rated real-ality Bravo TV hair-styling competition show Shear Genius! This was a very exciting week in so many ways. I finally discovered what makes Exotic Nekisa so exotic… she is Iranian! And did you know that she was “Iranian Of The Day” on July [...]

Ladies and Gentlemen – we’ve made it! Tonight we find out who America’s Favorite Dancer is – Twitch, Katee, Joshua or Courtney?! Only one of them was right when they thought they could dance – because tonight they’ll find out that they, indeed, can dance when they win So You Think You Can Dance!! (Get [...]

Narcissism Celebrated So apparently not enough people have complained to Bravo yet about how horrible this show is, so here we go with another episode of Date My Ex. After a quick look back at last week’s nightmare, we join Jo and her bimbette friends once again at Toast. Brunette Friend wants to know what [...]

Hey Gasmii, I hope you’re all having a great summer. You know, it’s often during these hot months when people decide to drop all logic or sense of humility and move out to LA to start an “acting career”. Some get into porn, some end up becoming trophy wives, some grow pot or sell coke, [...]

Ladies and Gentlemen it’s time… we are at the FINALE. We’ve come a long way. Many have fallen – but four have risen. Who will shine tonight?! Who will make that final stretch to become… AMERICA’S FAVORITE DANCER?!? Hold on to your britches, start chugging the Red Bull (I am) – because there’s four hours [...]

This week, Project Runway has the opportunity to show these Chinese Olympic security guards smashed up boobies and blows it! BOOOOOOO!!! I see knees! LET ME THROUGH!

There are many things that Pam Anderson has done in her career to prove she’s got talent, and she’s shown off those talents plenty. For instance, consider V.I.P. She showed she wasn’t just some bimbo who wore a swimsuit. She showed that she could pull off the hard-hitting world of, um, bodyguarding aided by a [...]

Last night on Big Brother, Jesus was marinated in the germs that cause bad breath. Get me some nails.

I bet the exec’s at FOX were fuming that Nigel wouldn’t whip the kids into another 8 group dances to fill 2 hours. Although I’m sure the kids were expecting it – this isn’t cable – it’s So You Think You Can Dance !

Does anyone remember that show Kid Nation that was on TV last fall? It was the one where 40 kids were sent to live in New Mexico and start their own town. And in the end, everyone learns that maybe it isn’t such a good idea to leave kids to fend for themselves because they [...]

Dear Crabby, How many boxes of tissues will it take to get through this final episode of The Baby Borrowers? -Couch Ass Groove Dear Couch, A lot, but if you tell anyone I admitted to that, I will cut you! -Crabby Well kids, we’ve come to the end of this season of The Baby Borrowers, [...]