POSTS TAGGED: top chef

Tonight’s show is brought to you by the letters “S”, “T”, “F” and “U”…

Some will make it to Seattle, some will be put to DEATH…

Welcome back to where cooking meets terrible hairstyling…

I can say one thing for Chris.. he’s got guts.  Literally. And then there were 2. We are finally here at the Finale of Top Chef Masters. I can’t believe I won’t be stalking pictures of Curtis Stone anymore… well, at least until next season. Tomorrow I can stop sucking in my gut The Chefs [...]

  My prayer for the day: Please, my dear Lord (and by “my Lord” I mean Satan), please, please, let today be the day when Lorena gets kicked to the curb. If you are as powerful as you say you are SATAN, you will make this happen!!!!!!!!!  Thank God this sh*t is almost over.  Even [...]

Airdate!

  Paddy cake, paddy cake…  Well, it happened kids! Finally! And it almost didn’t happen (I’m looking at you, Nicole…)! SPOILER ALERT! Ding dong, the witch is dead! Jenna was retired in Thailand. God, Jenna made me tired. Do we really think she just got the bitch edit or was she really, you know, a [...]

Seattle?

Last week Gary went home. Boo. We liked Gary. Unfortunately the actual weak link of the team (starts with a L and rhymes with LIZ!) had immunity, so it was Ciao to our funny, happy guy. We begin in Florence where the teams find their newest clue. The teams shall remain the same. Neither Jenna [...]

Something smells fishy… The jokes write themselves, folks!    Song starts at 1:20… Wow, I just used a reference to a Sondheim song for my recap of a cooking show on Bravo. Doesn’t get much gayer than that, kids. Sorry for the delay, you guys, but I made it before show day!  Hope you guys [...]

So The Amazing Race meets Top Chef on ‘roids?

Feel like crying? Justifying? Apologizing? This is your episode, then!

Shahs of Sunset, Anniversaries on Atlanta, and Top Chef Reunion

Someone gets chosen to be Top Chef… and someone else will bitch about it.

Time for another Watch What Crappens podcast. This time around, B-Side of BsideBlog and I are joined by “Miss SH” from StoopidHousewives.com as we discuss all the latest craziness from Real Housewives of Orange County and Atlanta. We also touch on Kandi Factory and Love Broker before yapping away about the Top Chef finale. Take a listen! And remember you can always hear the podcast on the Sideshow Network, [...]

Keeping hot stuff hot and cool stuff cool just makes everything piss-warm…

More weird randomness and Chinese food!

The chefs flee Texas for the Great White North!

Hey everybody, welcome back to Top Chef Canada! That’s right, we’ve left Texas behind, knocked its dust from our boots, traded in the summertime heat for the blast chiller of a snowy mountaintop in British Columbia, which is actually neither British nor Colombian… and where they have a serious aversion to vowels Look at all [...]

The chefs find out who won Redemption Kitchen. Then everybody cries. The end.

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!

Wednesday, February 8th  Nature (PBS, 8 pm) Scientists follow a family of urban raccoons. Rural raccoons raid garbage cans. Urban raccoons steal cars. Modern Family (ABC, 9 pm) Claire thinks Phil’s new business partner (Greg Kinnear) is blatantly inappropriate, but Phil doesn’t notice. Of course Phil doesn’t notice; all sit-com husbands are practically retarded. Criminal [...]

Beware ANY bicyclist who rides like he’s hiding a boner!

Pee Wee Herman is back to terrorize Texans and creep out the Alamo!

Chummy teammates become bitter adversaries as the chefs are forced to cook to the death!

Jobless Grayson takes on Daddy Tom over some chicken-salad!

A diabolical conveyor belt and a visit from that scary-ass Charlize Theron in makeup!

Eeeeeeeevvvvvvvviiiiiiiillllllll bitches.

Wednesday, Jan. 18th Whitney (ABC, 8 pm) Happily unmarried Whitney (Whitney Cummings) and Alex (Chris D’Elia) seek advice from their friends when they realize they are close to relationship boredom. Well, at least their circle of friends isn’t an adorably quirky bunch. Oh. Brain trust. American Idol (Fox, 8 pm) Auditions in Atlanta. This. Again. [...]

Time to play Pretend Restaurants and “Blame The Bore-verly”!

Two words: Restaurant Whores!

Wednesday, Jan. 11 One Tree Hill (CW, 8 pm) Clay and Quinn encounter a mysterious problem. No matter what they try, their DVR just will not tape the Venture Bros. Nature (PBS, 8 pm) Street-smart kangaroos move into Australia’s capital city. “Clean and sober. Have a mate and joeys. Anything helps. God bless!” Suburgatory (ABC, [...]

Thanks for proving once again that fat people are whiny lazyasses…

We find out how much fun it is to cook with chemicals, and then everyone goes to HELL!

Monday, Jan. 2nd Hold on. Just let me get rid of this bimbo… The Bachelor (ABC, 8 pm) Ben Flajnik returns to the mansion for the season’s first cocktail party; a septuagenarian confesses her love for Ben; a bachelorette shows up at the mansion on a horse. Ben and Levi the horse have been spotted [...]

Twitter takes over and then Patti LaBelle finds BigFoot!

Gitchy-gitchy ya-ya Tom-Tom!

Wednesday, Dec 21 Erin Burnett Out Front (CNN, 7 pm) The former CNBC anchor heads her own hour-long general news program. I totally watch this for the news. A Home for the Holidays with Martina McBride (CBS 8 pm) Celebrities present inspirational stories of adoption; musical performers include Justin Bieber, Mary J. Blige, Gavin DeGraw [...]

Time to get wasted on tequila and have a meltdown!

It’s Tequila night on Top Chef, and that means bringing out your not-so-inner big fat bitch!