POSTS TAGGED: tvgasm

Last week was Christmas in Biermann land.  It was a clash between Kroy’s idea of a real Christmas tree that was strangely green and reeking of forest-y freshness and Kim’s idea of a real Christmas tree that’s pre-decorated and boxed up in the Big Poppa Gift Emporium just waiting to be plugged in and skirted. [...]

Wherein Ryan breaks it down for Barbara and tells her that he wants to make sure she doesn’t just want to sleep with him because that happens to him all the time.

Tonight’s Top 10 Shows for Thursday June 13th

John and Ellen may be smooching siblings!!!

Ick factor.

So this happened…

Tonight’s Top 10 Shows for Wednesday June 12th

This week on Bullshit Amish, we pick up where we left off last week with some guy named Mike who is a proud redneck and wants to beat up the disgusting Jeremiah who porked his girl.  Jeremiah claims that it’s all OK, because the girl had broken up with Mike before they slept together.  How [...]

Seven months in!!

Tonight’s Top 10 Shows for Tuesday June 11th

This JUST happened.

Tonight’s Top 10 Shows for Monday June 10th

Cheers to motherf-in motherhood!

Last week, it was the best of report cards, it was the worst of report cards.  Kim encouraged Kroy to try a new strategy of rewarding Brielle for failing a couple of classes by giving her back everything they’d taken away and letting her go to prom.  Brielle’s grades improved dramatically, and she had fun [...]

Well, Dance Moms is back. It seems like just yesterday that their season ended… but it was actually about two weeks ago.  Study shows that being on a reality TV show causes you to lose all sense of style. This is a long ass episode, so hang in there. Pyramid time and Abby is still [...]

Jalleytocali tackles the movie releases for the weekend of June 7th

Tonight’s Top 10 Shows for June 7th-9th

Wherein everyone gets paid, but only one gets to play Mortal Kombat whilst rapping in Portuguese.

The rules are there are no rules.

Tonight’s Top 10 Shows for Thursday June 6th

The bloodfeud continues…

Penis envy taken to new levels.

These bitches are craaaaaazy!!!

Tonight’s Top 10 Shows for Wednesday June 5th

Sex, bills & stalkers

No one is having sex

This JUST happened.

Winners!!!

Tonight’s Top 10 Shows for Tuesday June 4th

Last week on Breaking Amish, Sabrina got into a white trash battle royale with Jeremiah’s on-again/off-again girlfriend, Kim.  We resume right here with Kate, Sabrina, and Kim yelling at each other about respect.  Sabrina goes all over dramatic by calling 911 to come and get Kim, because the cops don’t have more important things to [...]

Her path was decided years ago. Let’s get to the root of the problem, er, issue, shall we?   Kris Jenner is crazy.  Crazy like a fox.  A fox with no shame what so ever. Who does this to their children for a buck?  BTW – one of them is PREGNANT!!! I feel like the [...]

Hi there Gasmi, it’s time for a little Dear TvGasm. Where we give unsolicited advice to made up questions from celebrities in need of help. We haven’t been around lately, because for the most part our celebrities have been muddling through life pretty well on their own. (Well for the most part, there has been one exception. Dear Amanda Bynes, you [...]

Tonight’s Top 10 Shows for Monday June 3rd

Last week, the Biermanns were making plans to keep making babies.  Since they can’t keep their paws off of each other, they’ll need to pursue birth control to time the births so that Kroy will be home. Learning the Art of the Mani-Pedi.   Nurse Kim knows very little about birth control or reproduction when [...]

JalleytoCali tackles this weekend’s movie releases and sees if there is anything worth watching.

Tonight’s Top 10 Shows for Friday May 31st – June 2nd

The sun sets on the majestic town of Savannah, Georgia.  Darkness descends on the looming ropes of Spanish moss.  Beautiful buildings watch over the quiet city streets where a trolly full of ex-Amish ghost hunters snakes through the dark.   Guess whose idea this was?  That’s right, Gasmii.  Our resident greaseball pervert, Jeremiah.  The ghost [...]

Nick is taking Ryan to see that band that is going to invade Pat’s house, poop in his toilet, eat all of his cheese food products, and sleep with his gerbil

Sex calendars, a dog couch, and a partridge in a pear tree

And lush is the new moist.