POSTS TAGGED: tvgasm

“I am all kinds of confused.” Hello beloved fans of The Bachelor! As you may or may not know, this last week some rumors started circulating on the interweb involving a Bachelor scandal of epic proportions. I have no idea if the rumors are true and I have no idea if I care if the [...]

This week on Desperate Housewives: Orson is pissed that Andrew makes more than he does; Susan goes ape-shit regarding MJ spending time with Katherine because, let’s face it, she’s a better mother (barring the whole daughter-getting-crushed-by-furniture thing); Lynette and Tom fight about money (shocking!); and Gabby and Carlos find out about a secret. And Edie [...]

Up next on The Shitty: Adam and Allie are psycho and want Jay to move out so they can live together and keep being psycho; Erin and Duncan sort of break-up; Whitney insults Olivia to her face and it is awesome; Olivia wants Nevan to move out; and Jay has a serious (kind of) question [...]

Previously on Brothers and Sisters: Ryan Lafferty (Walker) made his first appearance, but ABC doesn’t think you need to know that, because there are once again no previouslies. Lazy network monkeys. Do I dazzle you? Walker Manse. Nora is going out of town, telling Saul that she’s going to tour another facility for research for [...]

This week on Grey’s Anatomy, the show starts out with a serious tone as Addison Montgomery makes her way back to Seattle Grace. When the ambulance arrives The Chief and Derek meet it with hugs for Addison and the woman she’s with. They wheel in Addy’s brother as Addison tells Derek that he was fine [...]

Tonight, American Idol gets off to a really painful start and Ted Danson is still alive.

Gross! Ugly Betty begins with Elena pouring pomegranate seeds into a blender, mixing, and pouring into glasses. Wouldn’t it be easier just to buy a bottle of POM? Probably cheaper in the long run, and definitely faster than pulling those damn seeds out of the fruit in the first place. Ugly Betty, why must you [...]

Oh my goodness and holy ornamentation with a big dollop of outrageous shenanigans and drag mishaps 101. I think I screamed and whooped several times while watching this and my boyfriend looked at me like I was riding the Anne Heche/Margot Kidder looney train, which maybe I am. Every once in a while when I [...]

So I really wasn’t sure whether or not I wanted to recap yet another season of Making the Band. I just didn’t know if anyone was still paying attention to all of that faux drama anymore. But then Flipit kept sending me season previews, and I just knew that I had to get back in [...]

Hooray! The start of another fantastic season of Amazing Race! I just peed myself in 12 different languages I’m so excited! For those of you who want a rundown of the teams – check out my previous recap for all the goods. Let’s jump right into it now! We start off with a shot of [...]

Sweet, merciful, crap! Just when you think it can’t get any worse, they whip out false teeth for kids to get them through those awful Tooth Fairy years! But I’m getting ahead of myself, so let’s back up. Yep, that looks about right. I almost deleted this episode from my DVR because it was about [...]

This week on Lost, Jin learns French, Sun receives some unsettling news, and Locke gets to make another sacrifice to the Island.

This week on I Love Money 2, the crazy get crazier! Similarly, the horny get hornier. On VH1, those things are often one and the same.

Welcome back to another drama filled episode of the Real World Brooklyn! This week, Baya and Ryan finally make out, Chet and JD have a heart to heart and Chet might be gay, Katelynn and Baya fight over a guy, Sarah has bulimia and Scotty’s on roids. Well, either all that stuff happened, or the [...]

Don’t forget the tongue, Jason. Are you all ready for the Hometown Dates on The Bachelor? As a special Valentine’s Day present to you all, this recap is extremely tardy. You’re welcome.

Frobisher’s baaaaack!! And he’s more of a wuss than ever!

Dear Gasmi, This week I learned that blue cheese stuffed olives in dirty martinis are definitely the way to go. Yay vodka!! Other than that, Vicki starts her own cult, Lynne plays with her husband’s pole, Jeana discovers homeless people, Gretchen finally takes a vacation, and Tamra gets to reach the pinnacle of her dramatic [...]

In the great tradition of spoiled rotten brats on television, TVGasm brings you this week’s episode “Veruca Salt”. Starring our very own Veruca Salt hopeful, Jeremy (I’m dope, not I’m a dope) Jackson. Whooo hooo. I want it NOWWWWWWW!!!! In our country we embrace and applaud such self-absorbed brats and even praise them for their [...]

Welcome back kids! bBitz is back and it’s time once again to remember that 11 random couples + The World + 1 Million Dollars – adequate sleep + Phil = THE AMAZING RACE (and comic gold)! This season looks to be the most exciting one yet! They’ve shortened the amount of time on the race [...]

Tonight on American Idol, the season officially went off it’s fucking rocker.

Tonight on Desperate Housewives: Money money money money. Money! Susan wants M.J. to go to a private school; Gabby wants to slim down; Tom finds out about Dave’s lies; Lynette gets a loan from Bree; and the countdown to a non-Sheridan DH has begun. Boo! Not OK!

Welcome back to the Rock of Love Bus! There’s no doubt about the life lessons learned from Rock of Love, and this week we learn a big one about dressing trashy that I was happily able to apply to my own life. Man I wish I brought a book. Me too.

Annyong, Gasmii! I have a dirty secret to admit to you all this week. Don’t worry, it’s totally 90210 related. Here it goes…I actually liked this ep. Like, really liked it and not the way that you like something you hate. What’s wrong with me? I’m hoping it’s the cold I have this week. Like [...]

Previously on Brothers and Sisters: Apparently, nothing too important, given that ABC lets us just jump right into the episode. Justin and Rebecca are hot and heavy, making with the moaning and grinding. His cell vibrates, and when they ignore that, his land line rings. Do twenty-somethings even use land lines any more? I know [...]

Dear Crabby: What would almost single-handedly ruin an Ugly Betty episode? Dear Couch: The return of Jesse! No wonder they were considering canceling the show! Betty’s dandruff is really getting out of hand.

Hey First Hubby! Kim Bauer called and she wants her ‘Imperiled Loved One’ shtick back! Greetings Gasmii! The ’24′ buffet has offered up some mixed dishes so far this season, but things get tasty and action-packed this week! It’s smorgasbord of reunions, rescues, and a new mission for Bauer. And if that doesn’t sate your [...]

The Vaseline shortage in L.A. just reached critical mass. I’m still sad about Porkchop’s premature elimination last week, as were some of you, but I don’t think that this week would have been much better for her. Maybe if they had led with a comedic talent challenge we’d still be enjoying her presence. I’d like [...]

All week long in preparation for Grey’s Anatomy, we have been prepped and pumped for a huge Thursday night event where Grey’s Anatomy and Private Practice have an explosive cross over episode. This was meant to build excitement, but for someone who doesn’t watch Private Practice, all it did was incite a groan. Furthermore ABC [...]

This week on Bad Girls Club..the wrath of all things skank comes down on the Ambers, Ashley gets chubbier, there’s a bar fight, and lots of backstabbing and hypocrisy! Is everyone wearing tall rubber boots? You’re gonna need ‘em cause the shit is deep in this episode!

Hello Gasmii, here we are again, with children competing like racehorses only with more fecal matter. This week we see the Little Miss Georgia Spirit pageant where pageant officials are planning on seeing girls from “all over the state of Georgia.” Way to narrow that down, Mensa members. This pageant is a little more low-key, [...]

Last week’s preview teased us with the fact that one guy is going home because his girlfriend is more of a tool then he is. Since nobody likes a tease (I’m looking at you, VH1!) let’s cut right to the chase and get to the good stuff in this episode, which isn’t very much.

This week on Lost Kate fights to keep custody of Aaron, Sawyer has a Marty McFly moment, we revisit some old friends, and everyone is left wondering: “When will my nose start bleeding!?”

You’ve been on the edge of your seat for weeks (who hasn’t?), so you’ll be thrilled to hear I Love Money 2 is finally on the air! Join me after the jump for 90 minutes of boobs — the literal and the metaphorical.

This week on Hell’s Kitchen……There’s a shucking good time to be had by all, except for Chef Ramsey.

****Please welcome PopPrincess and That’sWhatSheSaid for their crack at Hollywood ! PopPrincess: So confession time….I’ve only watched like 15 minutes of American Idol this season. No clue who any of these peeps are. ThatsWhatSheSaid: I watched about 15 mintues last night in the first Hollywood round. Should I get wine? PopPrincess: Ohhh yes I’m going [...]

Dear Gasmii, This week our middle-aged mommas do their best to stay up late and shake their booties for us. I’m giving them an ever-loving ‘A’ for effort, cuz it’s hard to put in a long day of strutting, drinking, eating, bitching, gambling, slutting, and dancing, when you’re used to gently passing out by 9:00 [...]

OK, Houseaholics. I’m going to be up front with y’all. February is National Stomach Bug Month, and I’m celebrating with a tall glass of Pepto, trying to take notes while lying very very still on the couch under a heat pad. So I can kinda sympathize with this week’s POW. Is that anything like method [...]

Tyra, is that you? As if she ever looked that good. RuPaul’s doesn’t look like she’s missed a beat since the last time she had a TV show ten years ago. She looks simply scrumptious. Of course, you would too if you were photographed through a tub of vaseline and your makeup artist has the [...]

This week on Top Chef, Ripert is back and he’s hornier than ever. Beaten cross eyed.

Patty gets suspicious of Ellen, Uncle Pete gets his hands dirty, Phil gets kind of dirty all over, and Wes gets even stalkier, this time with more guns. It’s Damages – episode 5! So where do vengeful master she-lawyers and their young, novice FBI informants go to get a little R&R? No, not a $59-a-night [...]