POSTS TAGGED: tvgasm

In which Pauly has a happy birthday, and Mike does not.

 ****Please welcome SnoopK8 as your new Dance Moms recapper! She was just assigned, so the future episodes will be posted in a more timely fashion. Gettin’ it together round here! – Flip It’s on Hello Gasmii! Thank you so much for allowing me the opportunity to recap Dance Moms. It’s a dream come true. I [...]

He’s leaving, in a midnight cab to Staten Island

Monday, January 23 The Bachelor (ABC, 8 pm) Jennifer and Rachel get one-on-one dates; Ben takes eight lucky ladies horseback riding; Ben surprises a bachelorette at the after party; Emily warns Ben about one of the women. Courtney’s fiendish plot to rule the world unaccountably requires the destruction of a greasy-haired young man named Ben… [...]

R.I.P., Edie Britt. You’re up in heaven now, giving crabs to Benjamin Franklin.

Reese does a very bad thing.

***SunniSideUp is on break this week. Please enjoy your newest recapper as a sub, CannedGinger! Welcome to the family, girl! Greetings Gasmii! I’m thrilled to be writing my first official foray into the fun world of recapping — one day I was reading this site compulsively to avoid hurting my co-workers, and just one year [...]

I bet Sam Neill’s glad to be on a show that isn’t Happy Town. And I bet YOU’RE glad that I reminded you that Happy Town was a thing. See? I told you that I’ve watched pretty much every mystery show to ever air on American television! Welcome back to the recap for the premiere [...]

Carter doesn’t totally suck this episode.

Friday, January 20th Shark Tank (ABC, 8 pm) NBA champion Bill Walton helps a triathlete pitch his idea for a unique water bottle. He wears a Bottle Boy suit. Oh, Bill. Star Wars: Clone Wars (Cartoon Network, 8 pm) Obi-Wan enters a prison, disguised as a convict, in order to extract information; Obi-Wan must work [...]

Everyone wants to be the pretty girl at the ball. Well, the time has finally come, Gasmii. We’ve waded through a myriad of pretenders to the (Lost) throne, from the campy and ultimately un-fulfilling V to the tepid and unfocused The Event, all in the hopes that one day, somehow, we would find a show [...]

The Pig is in da house!

Oh, No. Here go hell come.

Well it’s back! Digging up alllllllll the freaks from the nooks and crannies of Savannah, Georgia. What an extravaganza this show has become! Such pageantry! My only regret is that the freak parade was a little light this episode. I wish they would have focused on the freak-a-zoids a little more, but I guess there [...]

Everyone realises Kim is bat-shit crazy.

Hansel & Gretel get the Once Upon a Time treatment. Yummy!

Eeeeeeeevvvvvvvviiiiiiiillllllll bitches.

Thursday, Jan. 19 American Idol (8 pm) Stability is the keyword for this season as the judges’ panel remains the same for the second straight year, the first time the panel has been the same in consecutive seasons since the addition of the (short-lived) fourth judge following season seven. “We’re holding stable” seems like a [...]

Bree, you ignorant slut!

Some mothers eat their young.

Week 3 of The Bachelor opens with the girls arriving in San Francisco, where Ben currently lives.  He sits down with his sister, Julie, and tells her about a few of the women: Lindzi, Kasie B., Courtney, Emily, and Jennifer.  Ben proclaims Jennifer the best kisser.  Julie is nervous the girls will break her brother’s [...]

Tabs works her magic on Ripples, a Long Beach gay bar. Head on over there, they’ve got water!

Wednesday, Jan. 18th Whitney (ABC, 8 pm) Happily unmarried Whitney (Whitney Cummings) and Alex (Chris D’Elia) seek advice from their friends when they realize they are close to relationship boredom. Well, at least their circle of friends isn’t an adorably quirky bunch. Oh. Brain trust. American Idol (Fox, 8 pm) Auditions in Atlanta. This. Again. [...]

Time to play Pretend Restaurants and “Blame The Bore-verly”!

Gordon whips an Atlanta BBQ joint into shape.

A thrilling Alcatraz prison cell! (Don’t worry, guys – the show is MUCH classier (and more exciting) than the real Alcatraz.) Howdy, Gasmii!! After a hefty holiday break, I think we’re all ready for some quality television viewing, don’t you agree? Unfortunately, it’s MIDSEASON – typically seen as the time of year when weak-ass pilots [...]

Mother’s a bitch.

Tuesday, Jan. 17 Glee (Fox, 8 pm) Finn’s plans for after graduation surprise his friends. A spin-off show in which he goes to college that lasts six episodes before being canceled? Snooki, look out! Taboo (National Geographic Channel) Humans have an inherent urge to fight. In some cultures, the boundaries of what is considered acceptable [...]

Hi, Gasmii!!  So sorry for the delay.  The Gasm has had some “issues”.   They’re also interfering with picture posting.  So this recap is a bit more text-heavy than usual.  I’m sure that will be resolved soon! So here we are at season 4 of Tabatha Takes Over (a/k/a Tabatha’s Salon Takeover).  This year, she’s branching [...]

This week was a nice reprieve from bitches beating each other up. We got to learn more about Big Ang(elo) and how she rolls with the Goodfellas. I have to say, I am loving her so hard right now it is not even funny. I want to go to her house for breakfast after a [...]

Monday, Jan. 16 The Rosie Show (OWN, 7 pm) Rehearsal for Rosie’s Theater Kids. Has Oprah got a theater charity yet? Then get me one, fool, before she thinks of it! What’s it spelling? L, I, M, O, R, I, D,E, O, F, S, H, A, M, E. Oh, no! The Bachelor (ABC, 8 pm) [...]

Two’fer Tuesday on Teen Mom 2 tonight but I wish they’d play something good, like some Prince or some Elvis.

This is how they do it, Carter!

New Season, Same Jabby.

Use the cushion!

The “Gasmii Told You So” Episode

If there was more of a budget, a chandelier would have fallen on the fugliest dress.

Precious Moments

Thursday, January 12th Rob (CBS, 8:30 pm) Rob (Rob Schneider) meets his new wife’s large Mexican-American family for the first time and notices he doesn’t quite fit in. This Rob Schneider vehicle will last exactly as long as it takes NBC to realize that reruns of Two and a Half Men get better ratings. Project [...]

There’s a new sheriff in town. Waaaaaahhhhhhhhhh