Amber Portwood Back Into Custody

Watercooler

By Nads | Friday, May 25, 2012 | 1:21 pm | 11 Comments
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Posted in: Watercooler

Yesterday our favorite Teen Mom trainwreck told the judge that she’d rather serve time in jail rather than finishing out her court-ordered drug rehab program. How ridiculous is that, and WHO says that? She told the judge that she hasn’t stayed clean since the judge sentenced her to the rehab program, and that she’ll always be a “bad girl.” She’s currently at the Madison County jail until a hearing is set. 

I want to know on what planet she’s living on? She’s in the free world with her daughter, and she’s choosing jail? For up to five years? I wonder if she thinks jail will be like summer camp? No kids, she has a place to sleep, and a story to write a “tell-all” when she gets out…that is after she learns how to read and write. Happy jailing, Amber. I can’t wait to see her follow-up special on Jerry Springer in five years. 

About

Although comedy is her profession, Nadine has accomplished a lot in her young age. She is a national champion black belt, a world-class soccer player, and an avid snowboarder. She started playing soccer at the age of 4, and continued playing through college where she majored in Biology, but quickly realized her destiny was to tell jokes, not to wear a lab coat. So she decided to be funny while finishing her Bachelors Degree in biology and continued on to get her M.B.A. Nadine’s comedy style is much like her athleticism, fearless. She’s made her way up the comedy ladder very quickly, and has become a club favorite at many of the country’s top comedy clubs, including the Improv chain. Performing in the Boston Comedy Festival and being noted as the “one of the youngest and brightest up and comers” and traveling to the Middle East to entertain the troops are just a few of her notable accomplishments. These days Nadine splits time between the stage, a radio studio, her computer blogging, and a television studio. Nadine’s TV, Radio, Writing credits include: national commercials, talking head roles on E! Entertainment, Showtime’s Hot Tamales Live, The Skinny: Fat Free News, The Sunny Side of The Truth: Real World Hollywood, TVgasm, Zazreport, Daddy’s Girls, Jerseylicious, celebrity interviews on Mania TV, a weekly half-hour television show that syndicates to colleges across the country for National Lampoon and a nightly radio show on XM Satellite Radio.

11 Comments

  1. 1
    Yvonne Aranda
    Posted May 25, 2012 at 3:37 pm

    Shes a deadbeat mom & I feel so bad for her daughter. With parents like that the child might end up seriously messed up. This whole thing has gotten out of hand, from what I can tell she won’t get it together anytime soon.

  2. 2
    Classy Drunk Classy Drunk
    Posted May 25, 2012 at 3:41 pm

    You know who says that Nads…someone on drugs :(

    Poor Leah…

  3. 3
    Robin Robinez
    Posted May 25, 2012 at 6:35 pm

    I am confused by what she said. She says that she hasn’t stayed clean during her rehab program, yet asks to go to prison (more than a yr is prison, not jail) where she will find it harder to maintain her habit? Wouldn’t she just work the rehab instead of taking the drastic measure of going to jail/prison?

    I think the dumbass has it in her mind that she will get a show for being a bad ass. Thats why she mentioned it in court. She is sooo bad she will go to jail rather than do what they tell me to.! pffft. You are still getting locked up..

  4. 4
    sarcasatire sarcasatire
    Posted May 25, 2012 at 7:24 pm

    I feel bad for her. I think what Amber is saying is that she can’t maintain sobriety while out and about. Drugs are too accessible. I think it’s commendable that she realizes this and it shows her determination to get clean. I’m just wondering why she wasn’t placed in an in-patient treatment center? I guess it’s cheaper to place people in prison than in a rehab center for the same amount of time? Either way, she realized that being left to her own devices only enables her self-destructive behavior. Hope she gets clean in jail and that GED since she can’t use a busy toddler as an excuse for not studying.

  5. 5
    kthxbai kthxbai
    Posted May 26, 2012 at 12:10 am

    @sarcasatire I think she needs to be in an in patient place too. And not just because of drugs. My guess is that she’d been needing some mental health care for a while before she ever got on TV.

  6. 6
    sarcasatire sarcasatire
    Posted May 26, 2012 at 1:20 am

    @kthxbai, yes. Amber has other issues besides drugs. Watching her on TV, I would always wonder…where is her mother? She was 16 when she got pregnant by a 20-yr old..and she didn’t have the support like other teen moms. Her dad is dying of cirrhosis and her mom is absent. Whether as a ten mom or a drug addict, Amber needs a support system and, sadly, she can’t find that anywhere.

  7. 7
    HKk1
    Posted May 26, 2012 at 6:12 am

    This is so sad. Poor Leah won’t be able to be with her mom until she is almost nine years old. If any of the parents should have put their baby up from adoption from TM1 it should have been Amber & Gary. Heartbreaking.

  8. 8
    HKk1
    Posted May 26, 2012 at 6:14 am

    Oh and she’s going to PRISON not jail.

  9. 9
    hot cawfee
    Posted May 27, 2012 at 6:10 am

    I agree– her problems are more than drugs. Poor Leah–so cute. Where is Big Gary in all this? His mom seemed like a good person take custody of Leah.

  10. 10
    Robin Robinez
    Posted May 27, 2012 at 7:44 pm

    I still think she is trying to play billy badass so she will get a reality show. They haven’t had a “16 Months For 16 and Pregnant…yet.

    I don’t feel sorry for anybody that I have seen assault a child’s father in front of the child. Worse, a slap while the baby was in the fathers arms. She doesn’t deserve my feelings. Just observations.

    I hope the baby turns out ok. I would suggest therapy for the rest of her life, and her Dad quit taking her out to lunch all the time; this is her way of stuffing her feelings and she is starting to look like her father…

  11. 11
    kthxbai kthxbai
    Posted June 2, 2012 at 12:13 am

    This is really too depressing to even say on here. But that family’s been fucked up at least since the baby sister died. Her mom looks like she takes about a cupful of tranquilizer pills every couple of hours. And her dad’s dying of cancer.

    All that would mess even a genius up. But for a little kid that’s also dumb as a box of hair, it’s not like she’s had all these inner resources she could whip out.

    Supposely the pill she’s addicted to now is actually 1 they give people to help them get off of opiates and stuff. And trying to get off of it cold turkey can kill you.

    I think that’s what she’s hoping for. And even if it doesn’t prison won’t take long to do it. ( I doubt her 2 wks of Krav Maga classes at the strip mall are going to make her seem real intimidating)

    But she’s already been in the system enough to know if she comes out and says she wants to die, they’ll throw the house out the window to make sure she doesn’t.

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