Hi there Gasmi, just checking in to let you know that sometimes Christmas comes early, sometimes it comes on time, and occasionally it shows up a little late. If you are a fan of quality fug bucking nuts celebrity gossip, then the following is not only a late arriving X-Mass gift from US Magazine, but it’s good enough to cover Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and whatever the hell those hairy legged Wiccans celebrate. It’s just that good. How can you be sure? Two words Gasmi, Britney Spears.
Here are a few other words to wet your appetite: $4,500 worth of Archie comic books, a stolen Capital One Credit Card, KFed’s brother, an alleged tiny penis, blackmail, and the true father of Sean Preston. Pretty incredible, huh? Well I told you it was Kwanzaa good.
It gets even better when you spell it all out. Kevin Federline’s brother Christopher is claiming that Britney Spears stole his credit card, bought over $4,500 worth of Archie comic books, and when Christopher called her out on her actions Britney told him he had a tiny penis, and if he went to the police, she would tell the world that Christopher was the father of her first child, and not Kevin.
Christopher then went to the police, because dang dude, he’s on the hook for $4,500 bucks worth of Archie Comic Books. I mean, do you know how many shifts you have to work at Lady Footlocker to cover a nut like that? [ In the interest of full disclosure I should mention I have no idea where Christopher Federline works, but I can only assume based on this story it isn't for NASA.]
Anyway, here’s a good rundown of the story by US magazine, courtesy of Jezebel.com
In the papers, Christopher claims that Spears pocketed his Capital One credit card after finding it on Federline’s coffee table while swinging by to pick up Sean Preston and Jayden James.
Spears, 31, then allegedly used his credit card to buy $4,569.02 worth of Archie and Betty Boop comics, as well as issues of Mad Magazine for the boys.
When he reached out to Spears to dispute the charges, she “laughed at me and told me my brother Kevin ruined her life,” “told me I have a small penis, she also blackmailed me and told me if I tell the police that she stole my credit card that she will tell the world I’m the true father of Sean Preston, not Kevin,” Christopher added.
Though Federline’s brother claimed to have slept with Spears, he said that he sought a restraining order from the singer because “the public does not need to know.
Wow, that is some quality old school white trash crazy. Are you paying attention Lindsey Lohan? You don’t have to run people over, or plow into a garbage truck to get attention for all the wrong reasons. All you need are $4,500 worth of the adventures of Jughead and Mr Weatherby, and an ex-brother-in-law who is allegedly hung like a cashew.