New Zodiac Signs??? WTF!

Watercooler

By Nads | Friday, January 14, 2011 | 4:12 pm | 17 Comments
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Posted in: Watercooler

Zodiac_pictures

Ok, so I’m a little confused. An astronomer can just change zodiac signs at the drop of a hat? Astronomer, Parke Kunkle says that due to the changes in the Earth’s alignment, all zodiac signs have changed. I get that the Earth has changed, and things have shifted, but are we just supposed to change our Zodiac sign like it’s no big deal? Am I supposed to throw away all of my Gemini paraphernalia? My necklaces, my charms, my ego?? Do I start reading my horoscope as a Taurus? I don’t feel like a Taurus. I wonder if I’ve let my zodiac sign define me all these years. I mean, what if I were born a Taurus, and then all of the sudden became a Gemini-it just wouldn’t feel right.

I hate that this dude has now made me question my zodiac sign. Thanks a lot for ruining my morning bathroom astrology read, Parke.

Here are the new signs:

Capricorn: Jan. 20 – Feb. 16
Aquarius: Feb. 16 – March 11
Pisces: March 11- April 18
Aries: April 18 – May 13
Taurus: May 13 – June 21
Gemini: June 21 – July 20
Cancer: July 20 – Aug. 10
Leo: Aug. 10 – Sept. 16
Virgo: Sept. 16 – Oct. 30
Libra: Oct. 30 – Nov. 23
Scorpio: Nov. 23 – Nov. 29
Ophiuchus: Nov. 29 – Dec. 17
Sagittarius: Dec. 17 – Jan. 20

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WTF is Ophiuchus??? A 13th sign? This is all so confusing.

About

Although comedy is her profession, Nadine has accomplished a lot in her young age. She is a national champion black belt, a world-class soccer player, and an avid snowboarder. She started playing soccer at the age of 4, and continued playing through college where she majored in Biology, but quickly realized her destiny was to tell jokes, not to wear a lab coat. So she decided to be funny while finishing her Bachelors Degree in biology and continued on to get her M.B.A. Nadine’s comedy style is much like her athleticism, fearless. She’s made her way up the comedy ladder very quickly, and has become a club favorite at many of the country’s top comedy clubs, including the Improv chain. Performing in the Boston Comedy Festival and being noted as the “one of the youngest and brightest up and comers” and traveling to the Middle East to entertain the troops are just a few of her notable accomplishments. These days Nadine splits time between the stage, a radio studio, her computer blogging, and a television studio. Nadine’s TV, Radio, Writing credits include: national commercials, talking head roles on E! Entertainment, Showtime’s Hot Tamales Live, The Skinny: Fat Free News, The Sunny Side of The Truth: Real World Hollywood, TVgasm, Zazreport, Daddy’s Girls, Jerseylicious, celebrity interviews on Mania TV, a weekly half-hour television show that syndicates to colleges across the country for National Lampoon and a nightly radio show on XM Satellite Radio.

17 Comments

  1. 1
    considerthis
    Posted January 14, 2011 at 4:28 pm

    Traumatized by this news. I am a Libra 4 Life!

  2. 2
    Elmstreet
    Posted January 14, 2011 at 5:38 pm

    Don’t worry Nads! It’s not true. That astrologer guy just like those people who believe in the Mayan Calendar/End of the World thing. And there is no way he’s going to make my stubborn, change-hating Cancer self think otherwise.

  3. 3
    Stewinberri
    Posted January 14, 2011 at 5:52 pm

    Ophiuchus/Serpentarius you’ve been around as a rumour since 2000. I guess we’ve reached the tipping point. Hopefully now you will have your 15 minutes, crash and cosmically burn! If not rumour has it that you only affect those born after 2009. In either case I steadfastly refuse to consider myself a water sign instead of a fire one!

  4. 4
    Loiseauchante
    Posted January 14, 2011 at 6:31 pm

    Same exact thing for me! Gemini to Taurus?? Never.

  5. 5
    nads
    Posted January 14, 2011 at 6:40 pm

    @Elmstreet – thanks. I was like who the hell is this guy to change MY identity.

  6. 6
    vallegirl vallegirl
    Posted January 14, 2011 at 7:10 pm

    I can’t be a Leo. I just can’t. I have to be a Virgo, otherwise my judgmental nature just means I’m a bitch.

  7. 7
    itchy
    Posted January 15, 2011 at 1:16 am

    Next thing you know, they’ll be telling us that virgins can’t really give birth, then all hell will break loose. You’ll see.

    Anyway Nads, you’re still the same person. You just have to read a different paragraph in the horoscope section, that’s all.

  8. 8
    bebe
    Posted January 15, 2011 at 5:36 am

    The siderial zodiac has been like that forever. I do not understand why its a big deal all of the sudden.
    In the US we follow the tropical zodiac so it doesnt mean anything to us. People do some research do not just believe what people tell you.
    Wake up people!!!!!

  9. 9
    mommy2bree
    Posted January 15, 2011 at 6:50 am

    My question is, why in the world is Scorpio now only 6 days long??? Really? We need to cut Scorpio short so we can make up this new sign? Whatever, astrologer dude.

  10. 10
    Xouille Xouille
    Posted January 15, 2011 at 7:12 am

    Parke Kunkle is an hack. What he calls a change has existed for milleniums and is called sidereal astrology.
    We westerners use the tropical astrology based on seasons and hindu astrologist use sidereal astrology based on the position of the stars.
    And since the calculations are different, the dates for the signs are not exactly the same.
    Ophiuchus is an hoax and is not part of either one of the zodiacs.

  11. 11
    sploosh
    Posted January 15, 2011 at 7:31 am

    Who cares besides those hacks who write daily horoscopes?

  12. 12
    Brootessa
    Posted January 15, 2011 at 1:47 pm

    There is no way I am changing from a Taurus – too stubborn I guess.

  13. 13
    hutchlover
    Posted January 15, 2011 at 4:13 pm

    Brootessa, me too!

    As a “cusp” baby, they’re always trying to stick me in the Aries group, but I refuse to go!

  14. 14
    sheesh
    Posted January 17, 2011 at 10:44 am

    What? Now I can’t use the excuse “I’m an Aquarius, with my Aries rising and my moon in Pisces…I can’t help the way I act!”
    That’s some buuuulllshite.

  15. 15
    Rachel
    Posted January 17, 2011 at 2:36 pm

    Supposedly this change only effects anyone born in 2009 and after. I’m not sure of the reasoning…but thats what I read.

  16. 16
    ilovemytv
    Posted January 17, 2011 at 5:07 pm

    i’m still getting a gemini sign tattoo.. can never change me to a Taurus, not even at gun point!

  17. 17
    kittkatt
    Posted January 19, 2011 at 7:32 pm

    So as an Aquarius I was “sexually adventurous”, but as a Capricorn I’ll just be considered slutty? I don’t think so! Aquarius at birth, Aquarius till I die! Aquarians FTW!!!!!!!

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