The Situation Enters Rehab

Watercooler

By Nads | Tuesday, March 20, 2012 | 5:52 pm | 25 Comments
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Posted in: Watercooler

The Situation has entered an inpatient rehab program for substance abuse. I wonder what his drug of choice was?? Nose Candy? And is he just going to rehab because he needs extra attention now that Snooki’s pregnant? So sweet…he’s doing it for the baby…ha.

I wonder how he’s going to make his extra money at club appearances if he won’t be able to party anymore? Sucks for him. He’s still a douche…now he’ll just be a sober one, until he needs more attention and that’s when he’ll fall off he wagon.

Jersey Shore is slowly becoming Sober House.

About

Although comedy is her profession, Nadine has accomplished a lot in her young age. She is a national champion black belt, a world-class soccer player, and an avid snowboarder. She started playing soccer at the age of 4, and continued playing through college where she majored in Biology, but quickly realized her destiny was to tell jokes, not to wear a lab coat. So she decided to be funny while finishing her Bachelors Degree in biology and continued on to get her M.B.A. Nadine’s comedy style is much like her athleticism, fearless. She’s made her way up the comedy ladder very quickly, and has become a club favorite at many of the country’s top comedy clubs, including the Improv chain. Performing in the Boston Comedy Festival and being noted as the “one of the youngest and brightest up and comers” and traveling to the Middle East to entertain the troops are just a few of her notable accomplishments. These days Nadine splits time between the stage, a radio studio, her computer blogging, and a television studio. Nadine’s TV, Radio, Writing credits include: national commercials, talking head roles on E! Entertainment, Showtime’s Hot Tamales Live, The Skinny: Fat Free News, The Sunny Side of The Truth: Real World Hollywood, TVgasm, Zazreport, Daddy’s Girls, Jerseylicious, celebrity interviews on Mania TV, a weekly half-hour television show that syndicates to colleges across the country for National Lampoon and a nightly radio show on XM Satellite Radio.

25 Comments

  1. 1
    carol
    Posted March 20, 2012 at 6:09 pm

    This was a long time coming but the whole timing of it seems a bit suspicious. Right after they announce a 6th season? You know these kids lives are totally controlled by MTV/publicist so big moves like this are all planned and discussed. Wonder if while in rehab Snitch will also have to go clean of steroids?

  2. 2
    SuburBint
    Posted March 20, 2012 at 6:32 pm

    Color me not-at-all-surprised. I would like to know exactly what he was on, because he has been so obviously on something all this past season, and my vote is definitely for cocaine.

    Season 6 is going to be interesting, and by interesting I mean hopelessly dull. Snooki and Mike both not drinking? That eliminates 93.7% of all of the drama in the house right there.

    zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  3. 3
    R2Dcups
    Posted March 20, 2012 at 7:25 pm

    E is reporting that it’s not

  4. 4
    SuburBint
    Posted March 20, 2012 at 8:03 pm

    Not blow? I’m intrigued….

  5. 5
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 4:13 am

    Your job, should you choose to accept it, SuperB is cut out for you. Sober, dramaless house? The only saving grace for any conflict at all is that he isn’t in for the rehab he really needs, and that is being a complete douche. Oh how I hate that word, but it is the only one that fits that insufferable– well, you know.

  6. 6
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 4:38 am

    What else could he be addicted to? I couldn’t be alcohol because that is Jersey water. What is life for them without Ron Ron juice?

  7. 7
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 4:46 am

    Oh ClassyD (like better than PaulieD) love the “Jersey water” quip. Even though E says no blow, I’m betting on blow… and roids. Now there’s a combination for a winning personality.

  8. 8
    hot cawfee
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 5:08 am

    hhmm– and he is not on Celebrity Rehab???
    Cawfee is puzzling this one. I agree that he has a real problem and I vote for coke n ‘roids like Snowycat. And yes the timing of it is very suspicious. How long before we get to see the Sitch-ervention that precedes this??????

  9. 9
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 5:14 am

    His people are saying he checked in to the facility for “rest”.

    I just re read the last line Nads…slowly becoming sober house. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!

  10. 10
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 5:25 am

    Oooh, oooh, Cawfee… Here’s a song Snooks can sing to the baby…

    “Coke n ‘roids
    Coke n ‘roids
    I just love my coke n ‘roids”

    She can have one of her writers make up the rest for her.

  11. 11
    SuburBint
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 6:29 am

    All the gossip/news sites I’ve read also say “rest.” I guess I would need to rest too if I spent every waking moment being an insufferable… honestly, there’s not a word in the English language that fully sums up what he is. Every thing I can think if would be an insult to the other those-things in the world, because Mike is just the worst.

    THE WORST.

  12. 12
    SuburBint
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 6:45 am

    I spent most of my early 20′s living with, dating, and being friends with people who were in AA/NA. For a lot of them, drama became the replacement for their substance of choice (plus coffee and cigarettes, of course,) so if Schitz actually does completely sober up the way one is supposed to following a stint in rehab, we can probably expect him to crank the drama into the stratosphere.

    I can’t even begin to imagine how horrifically he would abuse Step 9 (making amends to the people you have wronged.) I have seem some truly spectacular shit go down in the name of “honesty” when people have gotten to that step in their recovery process… and we already know what happens when Mike decides to “Gym, Tan, Tell the Truth,” so that could get legitimately interesting. Also, he is so obviously the kind of person who would quote The Big Book incessantly and condescendingly, and the focus of every situation would be pulled to his recovery.

    Of course, if he really does care about getting sober, he won’t be going back to the shore…

  13. 13
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 7:38 am

    Well, as long as he is the epitome of whatevs, he’s happy.

    Let’s see– making an honest try for sobriety or fame and money. hmmmmm.

  14. 14
    NotWithoutMyTV notwithoutmytv
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 7:55 am

    When you need “rest”, you can nap on your couch. Or go on vacation somewhere quiet.

    You don’t go to rehab for rest. I don’t know why publicists keep saying that, when we know that they know that we know it isn’t true.

  15. 15
    SuburBint
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 8:15 am

    In all fairness to the Sitch, and I can’t believe that I of all people am defending him, but how is he supposed to nap on his couch when Snooki almost certainly peed all over it the last time she came to visit?

  16. 16
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 8:24 am

    Oh they aren’t lying. He needs a “rest” from drugs. It’s just a play on words.

  17. 17
    SuburBint
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 8:33 am

    Exactly. Why work the sobriety angle to stay famous when he’s got at least another year of drunken wastrel fame ahead of him? Sobriety is his “safety school” at this point, he can always milk it properly when Jersey Shore finally truly does get cancelled.

  18. 18
    SuburBint
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 8:34 am

    Is anybody else getting bombarded with ads for rehab facilities while on this page? LOL

  19. 19
    NotWithoutMyTV notwithoutmytv
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 9:23 am

    They could have said “Mike has entered treatment for a problem with his nose: he puts too much cocaine up there.”

  20. 20
    sardini
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 9:34 am

    I heard from a friend (yes, total second hand information – take it as you like), that he was living in Miami. He was a known pill addict, I think vicodin, perkosets and things like that. I could see it. Prescription drugs can fuck with your mood, attitude towards others etc. Plus they are the total drug du jour these days.

    I agree, NWMTV, go to a spa or a hotel if you need rest. Why would you even chance going to rehab publically if you weren’t on drugs? But I’m not going to knock anyone for trying to get help.

  21. 21
    SuburBint
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 9:39 am

    Because he is Mike, and “publicly” is his favorite way to do everything.

  22. 22
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 9:49 am

    Yep. A few miles from where we lived a few years back. beautiful, pricey area and I’ll bet the rehab prices are a bit beyond the means of most of us.

    Not that any of US would need it. oh what the heck. It’s 5:00 somewhere.

  23. 23
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 9:52 am

    NWMTV, With a nose like Schitz’s, that would be one expensive habit.

  24. 24
    WaffleBoy
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 12:38 pm

    I’m wondering what it is going to be for those people who are in rehab with him? you just know that at least one person is GOING TO BE PERMANENTLY BANNED FROM PEPPAS AND ONIONS NIGHT! It’s gonna be a long 28 days

  25. 25
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted March 21, 2012 at 6:02 pm

    Worse, WaffleB, to punish just one person they could CANCEL peppas and onions (I think it would be peppas and sweet sausage) night. Oh now I’m hungry and I just ate.

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