The Biggest Loos

by ChickBomb

According to multiple media outlets, Rebecca Loos, otherwise knows as the “personal assistant”/ho who nearly broke up David and Victoria Beckham’s marriage, is following the couple to LA, in a move that I find not at all desperate.

Single White She-Male

Allegedly, VB is furious over the news. According to “a source”, meaning “totally clueless wanna-be publicist hired off craigslist uk”, “Rebecca has been meeting with some of Hollywood’s top casting directors. Hollywood is a very small place and it’s likely they will be vying for the same roles. It will be so awkward if they bump into each other at castings.”

Furthermore, Loos says she won’t go out of her way to avoid the Beckhams in the US, “If I saw them in Los Angeles. I wouldn’t avoid them. I don’t know what I would say, but I’m sure Victoria would talk to me.”

CB’s top five reasons why VB really has nothing to worry about:

1. Meeting with top casting directors? Doubtful, considering only me and about five other gossip obsessed anglophiles even know who the fuck Loos is.

2. Competing for the same roles? Not unless VB starts auditioning for low rent basic cable reality shows. Loos is a “lady” who stimulated a pig on a UK reality show called “The Farm”, which I doubt even my Rock of Love skanks would stoop to, which says a lot. Well, perhaps Clown Whore. And speaking of reality shows, why were we only treated on one episode of The Beckhams Come To America? It was sooooo may-juuuuhhhh!

3. She’s sure VB would talk to her? Assuming they frequent the same venues, and VB doesn’t hang anywhere that lets desperate floozies in.

4. There are way hotter girls in LA to be worried about.

5. And finally…no one likes the smell of LOOS-ER!