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On this day in 1945, “Il Duce,” Benito Mussolini, and his mistress, Clara Petacci, are shot by Italian partisans. I have a feeling this bit of history will spill over into this week’s Housewives of Jersey episode. I worry for Teresa’s safety.
Bravo’s version of Mussolini
The Blind Side (Sat, ABC, 8 PM) A well-to-do white family takes in a homeless black teen and helps him realize his potential on and off the football field.
The Green Mile: Family Edition. I like to this of this movie as the one Sandra Bullock won a revenge Oscar after her slimy husband gave her herpes.
NASCAR Racing (Sat, FOX, 8 PM) From Richmond International Raceway in Richmond, Va.
Wal-Mart will be closing early.
Cats 101 (Sat, Animal Planet, 8 PM) A cat co-hosts a radio talk show.
Caroline Manzo opened the door to furry faced no talents getting on the radio for no reason. Blame her.
Once Upon a Time (Sun, ABC, 8 PM) Regina tries to seduce David.
Desperate Housewives (Sun, ABC, 9 PM) Susan tries to build a car for M.J.’s soapbox derby.
And he tries to run her over with it, proving that even innocent children paid good money to be around her can’t stand her stupid ass. Desperate Housewives, PLEASE stop limping!! You’re almost done! MAKE AN EFFORT!
The Celebrity Apprentice (Sun, NBC, 9 PM) Celebrities are asked to write and perform a jingle.
Deborah Gibson will be at home throwing stuff at her TV. She missed her challenge. She’s an AAAARTISSSSST!
Mad Men (Sun, AMC, 10 PM) Don, Roger and Pete try to drum up new business.
I say forget all these stupid plots and just make every episode about Pete getting beat up and Peggy giving hand jobs. Thank you.
The Killing (Sun, AMC, 9 PM) Sarah looks into the Larsen family secret.
Spoiler Alert!: Another week where we don’t find out who killed the brat.
Real Housewives of New Jersey (Sun, Bravo, 10 PM) Teresa’s attempt at an apology turns into a violent brawl. Told ya!
YAY!! Melissa is scheduled to attempt singing again, so hopefully she gets hit by the table first.
Rocky 3 (Sun, CMT, 9 PM) Old foe Apollo Creed trains ex-boxing champ Rocky Balboa for a rematch with brutish Clubber Lang.
After Housewives, these guys all look like pussies.
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