Tonight’s Top 10 Shows: Friday, April 27

On this day in 4977 B.C., the universe is created, according to German mathematician and astronomer Johannes Kepler. And look how far we’ve come!!!

Shark Tank (ABC 8PM) A feisty couple from New York present what they think is the next trend in women’s accessories.

Not good at guessing stuff like this, but I’d bet this crazy invention won’t be comfortable shoes. Women refuse to purchase those.

20/20: True Confessions (ABC 10PM) A surgeon admits to dropping a body part on the floor.

As long as they weren’t his own nuts, let’s just give the guy a break. We should all have access to the five second rule at work.

CSI: NY (CBS 9PM) The team investigates when a body is found dismembered and left on four street corners.

I read a story about a dog eating a baby and thought BOOOOOOORIIIIIIING! Unless the baby’s dismembered and hidden all over the city like a scavenger hunt, what’s the point? You’ve got to be creative to kill and hold our attention these days.

Grimm (NBC 9PM) Leave it to Beavers

This plot could go so many ways. I’m conflicted. On one hand, what a mystery. On the other, I’ve avoided beavers my whole life and don’t know if this is the Friday night to dip back into that pond. Someone tell me what happens, I guess.

Supernatural (CW 9 PM) The Girl With the Dungeons and Dragons Tattoo

…dies alone.

Embarrassing Bodies (DFH 10PM)

A hidden camera show taking place in my bathroom. Assholes.

Ghost Adventures (Travel 9PM) The team, along with Vince Neil and Jamie Gold try to evoke Frank Sinatra’s spirit at the Riviera Hotel in Las Vegas.

Liza shows up instead and beats the shit out of them with a vodka bottle.

Fashion Police (E! 10PM)

The team tries to evoke Frank Sinatra’s spirit. Joan Rivers shows up instead and calls them ugly.

Whale Wars: Viking Shores (Animal Planet 9PM) Environmental activists head to the Faeroe Islands to save pilot whales from the natives’ ancient tradition of slaughter.

They should take a page from PETA’s book and get celebs to pose naked. Whale celebs. A nude Rosie O would stop people from murdering poor innocent…wait. Never mind. Stick with what you’re doing.

Fairly Legal (USA 9PM) Hot chick with big boobs and a short tight skirt is a brilliant lawyer.

LOL. Fuck you, USA Network.

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