Friday, March 9
It’s National Meatball Day!
Fair warning, ‘Gasmii, I just got back from an MRI and am completely strung out on pain/anxiety meds. It’s like watching somebody else’s hands typing. So if this post makes no sense, cut me some slack. I’m doing my stoned best.
Shark Tank (ABC 8pm) Body jewelry; movable basketball training apparatus; organic skin care; a rent-a-grandma business; Pork Barrel BBQ follow-up.
I’m stuck on the rent-a-grandma — what would you do with her once you got her? Have her bake cookies? Walk around with her hair in curlers? Watch her use old envelopes to write her shopping lists on?
Undercover Boss (CBS 8pm) Oriental Trading Co. CEO Sam Taylor discovers some employees are unhappy and unintentionally halts production in his plant.
I love Oriental Trading Company. Where else can you order six gross of miniature Hanukkah themed rubber duckies?
Grimm (NBC 9pm) During an investigation into an arson-related homicide, Nick meets a woman (Danielle Panabaker) in Portland’s world of fire-dancing who may be too hot to handle.
How about a Grimm/Portlandia crossover? That would be fun.
The Ultimate Fighter: Live (FX 9pm) Premiere: Dominick Cruz and Urijah Faber coach opposing teams of contestants competing for coveted UFC contracts, and the title of The Ultimate Fighter.
After the Stephan Bonnar/Forrest Griffin fight, they should have just shut the show down. And I may or may not have a Forrest Griffin action figure hanging above my desk.
Say Yes to the Dress: Atlanta (TLC 9pm) A bubbly bride is shot down by her posse; a bride’s first fitting is bittersweet.
I am seriously considering bribing my kids to elope.
20/20 (ABC 10pm) Pet Crazy: People who spoil their pets; TV personality Lisa Vander Pump discusses her dog; people who live with large and exotic animals; pet plastic surgery; footage of pets left alone at home; dancing dogs.
Nothing’s ever going to beat the Penn & Teller: Bullshit! episode where they talked to the guy who has a false testicle business so that neutered dogs still feel masculine and whole.
On Death Row (Investigation Discovery 10pm) Premiere: Inmate James Barnes opens up about the 1988 murder of Patricia Miller that led to his death sentence.
Exactly the type of uplifting show that I want to watch right before going to bed.
Portlandia (IFC 10pm) Season Finale: The hottest brunch spot in Portland.
Merlin (SyFy 10pm) In a forest, Camelot’s knights stumble across an eerie shrine. When Elyan ignores Merlin’s warning and disturbs it, terrifying events ensue.
The special effects on Merlin are worse than the special effects from the first season of Buffy. And that’s saying a lot.
Spartacus: Vengeance (STARZ 10pm) Episode: Sacramentum
Which is the capitol of Californium.
What will you be watching tonight?