Tonight’s Top 10 Shows, Monday, Feb. 8th

Watercooler

By NotWithoutMyTV | Monday, February 6, 2012 | 12:01 am | 6 Comments
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Posted in: Tonight's Top 10 Shows, Watercooler

Monday, February 8th

 

Courtney doesn’t love you.

The Bachelor (8 pm) Ben and the women travel to Panama; a two-on-one date ends with one woman being sent home; Kacie B. opens up to Ben; Chris confronts Casey S. about a secret she has been keeping.

Ben continues his graceless journey toward the ultimate dating-show pratfall.

The Voice (NBC, 8 pm) Hopeful vocalists audition for a spot in the competition.

If NBC cashiers Xtina, Biggest Loser would love to have her.

College Football (ESPN Classic, 9 pm) 2011: Texas Tech at Oklahoma.

I wonder if anybody there knew Shana Hughes?

 

In Oklahoma, they let me drive, too.

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (Bravo, 9 pm) Reunion, Part 2.

Taylor admits that sometimes she wakes up at night to find that her lips are gone; she claims that they call Radar Online and spread hurtful rumors.

Bizarre Foods America (Travel Channel, 9 pm) Andrew samples a food scene that has been given a new, high tech spin.

Liquid nitrogen turns everything into “astronaut food”.

Hawaii Five-O (ABC 10 pm) When Danno and his family are targeted by a vengeful dirty cop from Danno’s past, the team steps in to help.

Why couldn’t they make the villain a vengeful, dirty copyeditor?

Smash (NBC, 10 pm) When a tenacious producer joins a musical based on the life of Marilyn Monroe, a rivalry for the lead role percolates between a beautiful novice and a stage veteran.

A cheesy fondue of Showgirls and American Idol, with a nasty Glee aftertaste.

Jimmy Kimmel Live (ABC, 12 am) Actor LL Cool J; TV personality Angela “Big Ang” Raiola; Pitbull performs.

“Big Ang” fans, here you go.

Tonight Show with Jay Leno (NBC, 11:30 pm) Actor Dwayne Johnson; actress Miranda Cosgrove; a performance from Cirque Du Soleil’s “Ovo.”

It’s okay to be scared of Cirque Du Soleil. Understandable, even.

Countdown (Bloomberg, 1 am) Owen Thomas and Linzie Janis countdown to the European market openings.

Remember, Europe. If the good ship America goes down, we’re SO taking you with us.

By day, I'm an editor. That means I get a cruel thrill out of identifying the parts of other people's creative projects that suck, and alerting those people to said suckage. Sometimes, I get paid for it. I've been known to lose my appetite after seeing how a Thai menu has folded, spindled, and mutilated the Queen's English. Imagine what TV does to me! I guess that's why I wanted to be a recapper at TVgasm. My friends have heard all of my rants, and they are sick of them. TVgasm is a whole new captive audience! So, let's make a compact, you and I: you agree to read my recaps and take what amusement you can from them, and I agree to put into the print the outrageous observations about the show that you thought, but were too PC to say. Let's share our joyous rage after wasting another perfectly good hour in front of the television.

Oh, and I still believe that Magnum, P.I. was the greatest show on television. Although I have not seen Thomas Magnum fishtail that Ferrari in the opening credits since I was 14. If Magnum, P.I. actually sucked, keep your damn squeal hole shut and don't ruin it for me, OK?

6 Comments

  1. 1
    itchy
    Posted February 6, 2012 at 5:03 am

    Showgirls had bare breasts. And the worst actress of the late 20th century. What’s Smash got?

  2. 2
    NotWithoutMyTV notwithoutmytv
    Posted February 6, 2012 at 7:59 am

    If you’re like me, you freely throw around the phrase “worst [TV show/movie/pit fight] I’ve ever seen.”

    Showgirls was honestly one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. Smash looks like it’s going to suck the same way all these Fame rip-offs suck, but it can’t suck as hard as Showgirls sucked. Because it was Showgirls. Breasts and night vision do make everything better, but they can’t save something that was wrecked from the start. (Dating in the Dark comes to mind.)

  3. 3
    NotWithoutMyTV notwithoutmytv
    Posted February 6, 2012 at 8:02 am

    Come to think of it, I saw Showgirls at an actual movie theatre with a female friend. A friend friend. We agreed there would be no arm or shoulder contact on the arm rests, or leg bumping during sexy parts.

    Showgirls was so unsexy that those ground rules seemed sill afterward.

  4. 4
    Val
    Posted February 6, 2012 at 9:24 am

    Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (Bravo, 9 pm) Reunion, Part 2.

    Taylor admits that sometimes she wakes up at night to find that her lips are gone; she claims that they call Radar Online and spread hurtful rumors.

    LMAO! I knew those lips were up to no good!
    Love ya, NWMTV! I’m in loving mood today!;)

  5. 5
    itchy
    Posted February 6, 2012 at 11:45 am

    Oh yes, it was shocking how unsexy Showgirls was. Although Paul Verhoeven was later sainted for performing the miracle of making Gina Gershon unsexy.

    Speaking of unsexy, this is perhaps the best Bachelor season ever.

  6. 6
    Danielle
    Posted February 6, 2012 at 6:44 pm

    notwithoutmytv–you should write The Bachelor’s recap–seriously! Your one line had me laughing out loud.

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