Monday, February 13
I just want to say that it is an enormous and daunting privilege to try and fill NWMTV’s shoes, and I’m tickled pink to be here.
I got the rose… modeling… winning!
The Bachelor (ABC, 8pm) While in Belize, Ben takes the bachelorettes on dates that include diving with sharks, touring the jungle, and exploring Mayan ruins; Ben decides which women he will escort home to meet their families.
Ben uses the girls’ “sense of adventure” as a tool to determine who is most likely to have severe Daddy issues as the show moves inexorably closer to the fantasy suites.
How I Met Your Mother (CBS, 8pm) Marshall, Lily, Robin and Kevin celebrate Valentine’s Day with a weekend in Vermont; Barney meets his match.
Do we make any progress towards finding out who the mother is? No? Shocking.
House (Fox, 8pm) As Chase treats Moira (Julie Mond), a cloistered nun who is on the verge of making life-altering vows, they form a connection that causes Moira to question her faith; Taub and House take part in a series of pranks.
Now that they’ve formally announced that this is the final season, the show decides to keep viewers interested to the very end by doing nothing different whatsoever.
The Voice (NBC, 8pm) Hopeful vocalists audition for the judges.
I don’t get a reality show where people make it in based solely on talent. This is America, dammit!
The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (Bravo, 8pm) The Social Edition
Rich bitches being bitchily rich.
Alcatraz (Fox, 9pm) The team uses methods of the past to track former inmate Paxton Petty, who has returned to plant bombs in populated areas of San Francisco.
Because criminal science has made absolutely no advances in the past 50 years.
Hoarders (A&E, 9pm) A woman turns to hoarding, following her husband’s accidental death; a compulsive purchaser sometimes buys back his own auction items.
It would be silly to waste that money on therapy.
It’s only cute when you’re a Disney princess.
Being Human (SyFy, 9pm) Aidan’s relationship is taken to a new level; Josh’s search for a werewolf cure continues.
The British version was better: Discuss.
Castle (ABC, 10pm) Castle and Beckett discover that the killer they are pursuing is part of an international conspiracy, and they must work with a CIA agent with whom Castle has a history.
Captain Malcolm Reynolds and Inara bicker constantly in order to disguise their true feelings for one another.
SMASH (NBC, 10pm) Ivy and Karen work to please the director as they pursue their dream role; Julia and Frank struggle with the adoption process; Eileen works to finance the musical.
I feel sorry for whoever has to recap this snooze-fest.