Tonight’s Top 10 Shows: Monday, February 27

Monday, February 27

On this day in 1991, President George Bush declared that “Kuwait is liberated, Iraq is defeated.” I think we all know how well that worked out.

The Bachelor (ABC 8pm) Ben and the final three bachelorettes head to Switzerland for exotic dates that include a breathtaking helicopter tour, rappelling down a 300-foot ravine, and a scenic train ride; Ben questions his decisions when a rejected woman returns.

Unlike the rest of us, who question Ben’s decisions every time we see Courtney’s bitchy little face.

How I Met Your Mother (CBS 8pm) Barney pursues Quinn, even after learning she’s a stripper; Marshall and Lily show Robin what life is like in the suburbs; Ted tries to figure out what to do with Robin’s room.

It’s going to be legen- wait for it – keep waiting – keep waiting – keep waiting – keep waiting – I’ll get around to it in seven seasons or so. If you’re lucky.

The Voice (NBC 8pm) Episode: Blind Auditions, Part 5

This just never gets old to me.

House (Fox 8pm) The team works to save a blind man with a mysterious illness.

This show is actually really stepping it up in its last season. I had given it up during the Huddy period, but it is getting fun and interesting again.

Pretty Little Liars (ABC Family 8pm) Rosewood’s annual father-daughter dance creates generational conflict between its participants.

Shocking, considering how great these kids’ relationships with their parents are.

Alcatraz (Fox 9pm) A man who was wrongly sent to prison returns and starts committing crimes.

It’s amazing what you can learn in prison. And rehab. And second grade, if we’re being completely honest.

Bethenny Ever After (Bravo 9pm) Bethenny finds that she has trouble trusting anyone but her closest friends.

I find it deeply ironic when someone with a reality show talks about having trust issues.

Castle (ABC 10pm) When two women are found dead dressed as fairytale characters, Castle and Beckett must race to find the killer before he strikes again.

Maybe they should call in an outside consultant.

Hawaii Five-0 (CBS 10pm) The team crosses paths with a retired NYPD bomb expert while investigating the death of a famous talk-radio host.

Smash (NBC 10pm) Derek throws a party for a hot, young celebrity (Nick Jonas).

Nick Jonas has been in numerous Broadway productions. It’s nice when Disney child stars do well in their later careers without making a dozen stops at rehab before they’re twenty-one.

What will you be watching tonight?

To get the funniest quotes from TVgasm recaps as they’re posted, follow us on Twitter or like our Facebook page! You can post your favorite lines right back at us. Thanks for being here!