Tonight’s Top 10 Shows, Monday, Jan. 30

Watercooler

By NotWithoutMyTV | Monday, January 30, 2012 | 12:01 am | 4 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Tonight's Top 10 Shows, Watercooler

Monday, January 30th

The Bachelor (ABC, 8 pm) Courtney suggests Ben go skinny dipping with her.

And the remaining desperados who didn’t think of it first clutch their pearls and bunch their panties.

House (Fox, 8 pm) House threatens Foreman’s relationship with a married woman (Yaya DaCosta).

Yaya. Someone named their kid Yaya.

I’m not bitter, or anything.

Alcatraz (Fox 9 pm) When a notorious robber (Eric Johnson) returns from the past, Rebecca must extricate him from a hostage-filled bank before his identity is discovered.

If I never watch this show, I won’t be upset when the ending sucks balls, whether it gets no ending after 1 season, or an ending that spits in your face after 11 seasons.

Gossip Girl (CW, 8 pm) Chuck struggles to face reality as Blair prepares to walk down the aisle with Prince Louis; the return of Georgina Sparks (Michelle Trachtenberg) threatens the royal wedding.

Michelle Trachenberg’s acting has really improved; she can almost simulate an animate object now.

 I’ll always remember you this way.

The Lying Game (ABC Family, 8 pm) Emma Becker and Sutton Mercer are, unbeknownst to them, identical twins. Separated at birth and unaware of each other’s existence, the girls have led very different lives.

Helen Slater got old. I kinda wish I hadn’t researched this…

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (Bravo, 9 pm) The ladies of Beverly Hills talk about the seasons biggest moments.

The only thing anyone cares about is exactly which substances of abuse are getting through Twitch’s blood/brain barrier.

Being Human (Syfy, 8 pm) Josh and Nora prepare for another “change”; Sally looks into reincarnation; Aidan dates a human.

But in a Freudian slip he calls her “my little hors d’ovre”.

The Late Show with David Letterman (CBS, 11:35 pm) Singer Jennifer Lopez; actor Rob Schneider; James McCartney performs.

Dave’s got JLo…

The Tonight Show with Jay Leno (NBC, 11:35 pm) Singer Madonna; actor Chris Colfer; Joe Perry performs.

And Jay tries to counter with Madge.

The Colbert Report (Comedy Central, 11:30 pm) Lawrence H. Tribe, Professor of Constitutional Law at Harvard, is Steven’s guest.

Professor Tribe speculates how fast the founding fathers would turn to drugs if they could see how we’ve interpreted their little missive.

By day, I'm an editor. That means I get a cruel thrill out of identifying the parts of other people's creative projects that suck, and alerting those people to said suckage. Sometimes, I get paid for it. I've been known to lose my appetite after seeing how a Thai menu has folded, spindled, and mutilated the Queen's English. Imagine what TV does to me! I guess that's why I wanted to be a recapper at TVgasm. My friends have heard all of my rants, and they are sick of them. TVgasm is a whole new captive audience! So, let's make a compact, you and I: you agree to read my recaps and take what amusement you can from them, and I agree to put into the print the outrageous observations about the show that you thought, but were too PC to say. Let's share our joyous rage after wasting another perfectly good hour in front of the television.

Oh, and I still believe that Magnum, P.I. was the greatest show on television. Although I have not seen Thomas Magnum fishtail that Ferrari in the opening credits since I was 14. If Magnum, P.I. actually sucked, keep your damn squeal hole shut and don't ruin it for me, OK?

4 Comments

  1. 1
    itchy
    Posted January 30, 2012 at 12:36 am

    You’d think a Madonna would trump a JLo, no? Or is that a Gaga?

    This is why I never play poker.

  2. 2
    Alison Zimmerman
    Posted January 30, 2012 at 12:37 am

    —pst, don’t tell anyone, but I actally like The Lying Game. Tell you what, for an ABC Family show, it is much better that Hart of Dixie that the CW has going on over there! Ole Summer Roberts isn’t cutting it for me as the Doc, and I am not so impressed with Jamie Pressley( the blond chick, that is her right?)….

  3. 3
    Hypnotoad Hypnotoad
    Posted January 30, 2012 at 3:04 pm

    Hooollllld on a tic. Yaya from America’s Next Top Model is an actress now? I hate the world.

  4. 4
    sarcasatire sarcasatire
    Posted January 30, 2012 at 4:04 pm

    Hypno..She’s actually pretty good and was smarter than most of the other contestatnts (being a Brown graduate and all.) But Eva took the prize and Yaya got a better agent. I think she’s done a few movies..

    I always say that ANTM is one of those reality shows where the ‘losers’ end up with better careers.

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