Tonight’s Top 10 Shows: Thursday, August 16

Watercooler

By SuburBint | Thursday, August 16, 2012 | 12:49 pm | 15 Comments
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Posted in: Tonight's Top 10 Shows, Watercooler

Thursday, August 16

Elvis Presley (damn he was purty in his youth!) died 35 years ago today. In other news, 35 years ago today some of the most bizarre conspiracy theories and a cottage industry of tacky velvet paintings were born.

Wipeout (ABC 8pm) Former “Wipeout” champions team with memorable, but less-successful former contestants and tackle obstacles that include Mash-Mallows, Grin and Bear It, and Big Balls.

Like I was the only one thinking this.

NFL Preseason Football (Fox 8pm) Cincinnati Bengals at Atlanta Falcons

So… ya know… that’s on tonight.

Oh Sit! (The CW 8pm) Thrill-seeking daredevils compete for cash.

Musical chairs meets parkour. This must be what the halcyon days of the cocaine-fueled ’80s were like.

Time Machine Chefs (ABC 9pm) Four accomplished chefs compete for the title of Greatest Chef in History by using only the ingredients, utensils and heat sources available during a previous time period.

I can’t wait for the prehistoric episode where the chefs have to discover fire all by themselves.

The Next (The CW 9pm) When the mentors head to Orlando to meet contestants, Gloria Estefan shows a musician how to deal with stage fright.

“Okay, baby, here’s how you deal with stage fright. All you got to do is get on your feet, get up and make it happen. And if you’re still feeling a little nervous, you just get on your feet, stand up and take some action.”

Project Runway (Lifetime 9pm) The designers must get along long enough to create cohesive looks in a team challenge.

Apparently the surprise twist for next season’s Project Runway is that all of the designers have to work as air traffic controllers as well as working on their clothing. TPTB at Lifetime felt that the show’s name was too ambiguous and wanted to appeal to a broader audience.

High School Moms (Discovery Family Health 10pm) Premiere: A 16-year-old’s behavioral issues may cause her to be expelled; daycare fees may force another student to leave school.

16 and Pregnant wasn’t enough? Seriously, America.

Extreme Chefs (The Food Network 10pm) Premiere: Seven chefs scavenge for their ingredients and tools; freeze-dried foods; fires from scratch.

I swear, I had no idea that this was happening when I wrote about Time Machine Chefs.

Doo-do-doo-do, doo-do-doo-do.

The Real L Word (Showtime 10pm) Episode: Lost in a Bush.

When things get that bad, it’s time to call in the help of an experienced aesthetician.

Suits (USA 10pm) Harvey must close the person with the deciding vote in the firm’s future.

After that description, I can’t tell if this show is about lawyers or hit men. Maybe lawyers who moonlight as hit men?

What will you be watching tonight?

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About

After giving birth to her fourth child, SuburBint carefully weighed the options and decided that recapping reality TV was probably a better choice in the long run than alcoholism. Liver function tests have yet to confirm the wisdom of this decision. Being an honest-to-goodness recapper is also a dream come true, as she has aspired to do this ever since discovering that such a thing existed way back in 2002.

Her favorite shows of all time include Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Coupling, Breaking Bad, Sons of Anarchy, Firefly, Community, Parks and Recreation, Doctor Who, and Veronica Mars. She can also quote The Big Lebowski in its entirety, and will do so with little to no provocation.

 

15 Comments

  1. 1
    sheesh sheesh
    Posted August 16, 2012 at 1:05 pm

    Elvis…I adore the kitsch it has become.

    Rodel and I went to Graceland 2 January’s ago. I wrote on the wall and still have the sharpie! It’s an Elvis sharpie and is not allowed to be touched.
    I went into some kind of Elvis trance because by the time I was done I had two Elvis T-shirts, salt and pepper shakers that say “Elvis Rocks”, a clock, a piggy bank, and a TCB keychain, and a couple of coffee table books, a cookbook, and magnets, lots of magnets.

    Rodel’s mother loves Elvis too. When I first met her she took me into her bedroom to the shrine she had of her late husband (I shit you not, it was a shrine). There was his picture and a picture of Elvis side by side. She said, “Doesn’t my husband look just like Elvis, so handsome.”
    Rodel’s family is Phillippine. She’s batshit.

    Long live Elvis!

  2. 2
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted August 16, 2012 at 1:15 pm

    I just love the Elvis paintings on black velvet. You know, the ones with the eyes that follow you everywhere.

    I’m kind of a reactionary, so I recently discovered that he had a wonderful voice. Someday I’ll figure that out about Madonna.

    Right?

  3. 3
    sheesh sheesh
    Posted August 16, 2012 at 1:22 pm

    I want an Elvis Velvet so bad.
    I’m a purist though and I will not buy one unless someone is selling it out of a truck on a streetcorner.

    I haven’t seen it yet, but maybe I’m not looking hard enough.
    In Iowa.

  4. 4
    SuburBint
    Posted August 16, 2012 at 1:43 pm

    @ Sheesh — We have those trucks everywhere here in AZ! Come on down! Going to see the Grand Canyon is a great cover story.

  5. 5
    sheesh sheesh
    Posted August 16, 2012 at 2:46 pm

    Rodel and I are going to be doing a lot of traveling next year.

    I am stoked!

  6. 6
    sarcasatire sarcasatire
    Posted August 16, 2012 at 5:21 pm

    I love the idea of a Filipino Elvis lookalike. Rodel’s mom sound hilarious!

    Speaking of trucks, just found out we have a DNA truck rolling through the streets like the Good Humor man. I hope it has a catchy tune so when the kids hear it they say, “DNA man’s comin’!”

    http://newyork.cbslocal.com/2012/08/15/whos-your-daddy-truck-offers-answers-with-dna-tests/

    There is also a dentist truck (I mean, really) and a spay/neuter truck that parks in the neighborhood and offers services. We’ve taken convenient to a whole new level.

  7. 7
    labowner
    Posted August 16, 2012 at 5:26 pm

    Sarcastire does the spay/neuter truck follow the DNA truck around? If not it should…..

  8. 8
    sarcasatire sarcasatire
    Posted August 16, 2012 at 5:41 pm

    LOL. I smell a merger coming on…

  9. 9
    sheesh sheesh
    Posted August 16, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    Rodel’s mom is a hoot. She lost her muthafuckin’ MIND when she met my kids!

    My youngest son is pretty much a foot and 1/2 taller than…well all of them and Kel is 5’9″.

    She kept shoving food at them saying “I know you Americans…you love your mash potatoes…”

    We only had the bookmobile when I was a youngin’.

  10. 10
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted August 16, 2012 at 7:02 pm

    Hey, and one of the BBs is a mobile spray tanner (waaaaaay too many jokes there). How about Spray, Spay and DNA? Sounds kinda catchy.

    Yeah Sheesh. We only had the bookmobile too. And I never liked the selection. They catered to the bodice ripper sort, not future English lit majors. You must admit that you must have been a real shock to your mother-in-law!!!!!!!!!!!!! You are more our sort.

  11. 11
    sarcasatire sarcasatire
    Posted August 16, 2012 at 7:35 pm

    Spray, Spay, and DNA is genius!!

    A bookmobile sounds cool. We had in-school book fairs and the scholastic catalog they passed around nothing as cool as an RV Barnes and Noble. I was deprived!

  12. 12
    sheesh sheesh
    Posted August 17, 2012 at 5:16 am

    @SSC…I don’t say anything in front of Nay (Mom in Tagalog). ..and I do call her Nay. She’s just like any 72 year old meemaw that gives two shits about what she says.

    I love her! I tell Rodel all the time, “You’re mom is batshit, but that’s ok I’ll be batshit too when I’m 72.”

    I lost some weight and as soon as she saw me she said, “You…you…you lost weight.” Then she pulled me down and pointed to Rodel’s brother’s girlfriend and said, “Now go help her..she…she …she big girl.”

  13. 13
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted August 17, 2012 at 5:28 am

    @Sheesh, your Nay sounds like she’d fit in just fine!!!!

    @Snarkasatire, the bookmobile was sent around by the local library. Who said you New Yorkers and other easterners had ALL the cultural experiences??????

  14. 14
    Classy Drunk classy drunk
    Posted August 17, 2012 at 5:36 am

    I can’t wait to be 72. Sounds like it’s fun…

  15. 15
    snowshoecat snowshoecat
    Posted August 17, 2012 at 10:46 am

    Yes, ClasSay. I WAS lots of fun.

    Ah memories!

    *Giggle*

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