As I’m sure you all know, this weekend marks the 100th anniversary of the sinking of the R.M.S. Titanic. Not to make light of the lives lost in large part because of hubris and incompetence, but as far as long-term societal impact, the worst thing to arise from this horrific disaster involves Leo DiCaprio, Kate Winslet, and a certain Celine Dion song.
Saturday, April 14
Titanic (ABC 8pm) (Parts 1 – 3) Tensions rise during a disastrous tea party; the ship’s encounter with an iceberg incites chaos and panic on deck; a passenger, Louisa, must choose between her husband and her daughter; passengers race for spots on the remaining lifeboats.
Because the world really needed another overly-dramatic period drama based around the sinking of the Titanic. Thank you, ABC.
Escape Routes (NBC 8pm) In Atlanta, the teams design a backdrop for their escape; the contestants face challenges at a fire and rescue training facility.
Escape routes are an important part of fire training. Well done, NBC.
NASCAR (Fox 8pm) Sprint Cup: Samsung Mobile 500
I’ve never understood the appeal of watching cars go around and around and around and around, but if anybody would like to explain it to me, I’m more than willing to try and understand.
Welcome to Sweetie Pie’s (The Oprah Winfrey Network 9pm) Miss Robbie’s prized picture is stolen from the restaurant; Robbie’s grandson lies about dating an older employee; Tim and Jenae search for the perfect nanny.
I love sassy little old ladies who aren’t Betty White.
Last Chance Driving School (A&E 10pm) A stay-at-home mother’s driving lesson leads to disaster; Pete is pushed to the brink by a terrible first-timer; a student flirts with Sven.
SVEN!
Sunday, April 15
The Amazing Race (CBS 8pm) Episode: Let Them Drink Their Haterate
That episode title is so 2007.
Mob Wives (VH1 8pm) Drita tries to be a good example for her children.
Insert uproarious laughter here.
Titanic (ABC 9pm) (Part 4) The crew takes evasive action after spotting an iceberg but is unable to prevent a collision; as panic takes hold, Louisa makes a shocking promise to Hugh; Paolo turns to a mysterious passenger for help; life-changing events unfold.
So in Saturday’s episode they fight for spots on the lifeboats before spotting the iceberg? That’s a new twist.
The Celebrity Apprentice (NBC 9pm) Each team must make its own puppets and perform for an audience.
Is anybody else vaguely terrified by this prospect?
Shahs of Sunset (Bravo 10pm) Finale: Episode — Old Friends New Problems
Now we get to wait and see if it gets picked up for a second season. I guess that all depends on whether Bravo has an open slot for a show about rich people who refuse to take responsibility for all of the manufactured drama in their lives.
Magic 8 ball says:

What will you be watching this weekend?
Have an event or factoid that you’d like to share with the ‘Gasm? Want to draw more people’s attention to your favorite show? Hit me up on Twitter @SuburBint or email me at SuburBint@gmail.com, and I will do my best to hook you up!
If you like it, spread it!:
44 Comments
OMG. If it hadn’t been for you I wouldn’t know all about this major TITANIC ABC Movie. Thank you so much. I’m watching it.
Place blame where it belongs: James Cameron. All the rest were mere pawns in his blight on American popular culture.
Oh SuperB! “The Titanic sunk. People died. It was sad. ” I mean, it’s almost like I was THERE.
I live to serve.
Right? That was pretty powerful stuff. It was like I was just a vessel and the words moved through me. LOL
I’m not blaming Leo and Kate and Celine; residual income from that movie will probably pay for their summer homes for years to come. But I’m always blaming James Cameron for things, it gets old after a while (regardless of how valid it is!)
Why not blame James Cameron for things? All the ex- Mrs. camerons do.
SuburBint-I love NASCAR!! Huge fan of one of the drivers. He is from my lovely state of Washington. Superhot! Made the hubby stand in line all freaking day for an autograph!! What men do for love
We have been to the Vegas Race 3 times. had to miss the 2 years because the MR is deployed.
If you love to people watch, going to the race is the best place to do it! It is loud, but it is fun. We sit so close to the track that we get dirty!! Check out my fb page, and the pictures from the past few years, it is totes fun. I would suggest a dirt track if there is one local, I know they are not as expensive to go. Some of those drivers are good eye candy!!
Oh, and then there is Danica Patrick (gag me!!) for all the male fans of the sport….
Oh, ps. my great great grandpa was a stow away on the Titanic. He was caught and they gave him a job in the engine room! He was able to get off the ship, and my grandma was born in Montana
She has tapes of him talking about what it was like…:) Have a great weekend
I’m finding National Geographic Channel’s programming on Titanic to be much more interesting.
I could see racing as fun if you were racing, but NASCAR is the worst. The cars are literally built to turn in one direction, how boring is that?
I think some folks may think they have one of those cars, as seen by the perpetual lefthand turn signl person who always ends up in front of me.
I’m watching the ABC Titanic mini-series now, and it’s far more enjoyable than the James Cameron thing. Fewer histrionics…even though it’s the same sinking ship.
Rob, That was my mother. Sorry
The thing that got me about James Cameron’s Titanic was the part was the montage of the steerage passengers and the others who knew that they weren’t going to be given the chance to get on a lifeboat or else chose to go down with the ship; the mother with her two little kids, the elderly couple, the band playing “Nearer My God to Thee”… I was a complete blubbering mass of snot and tears. I could have cared less about Jack and Rose, but those brief scenes absolutely gutted me.
Your mom sure gets around, SSC, I was behind her just the other day!
I’m not ashamed to say it…I watch Nascar for the awesome wrecks! Other than that I find it a terrible bore ; )
Damn! I just love the way when she is about 5 miles from a turn, she gets in the “correct” lane and slows down– with the turn signal on. Don’t get me started on her pulling out into traffic.
I apologise to all the Gasmii.
HA! My mom will know she needs to get over, have an opening like one to two blocks before her turn, completely ignore it, and then cut people off when we’re 50 feet away from the turning lane. Scared me to death when she had to do all of my driving for me a year or so ago, I was convinced that we were all going to die horribly. She’s only 61, and complains vociferously about her 90-year-old father’s unsafe driving and how he should relinquish his license. I hope that when the time comes, she gives hers up without a fight! But it is unlikely.
The wrecks are cool, assuming of course that everybody walks away with minimal damage. But the continuous laps give me vertigo.
Never could watch the Cameron version. The first one sticks in my mind and it is a classic, schmaltz and all. And yeah, I sobbed watching the elderly couple refusing to part going down.
Excuse me. No, no. I’m fine.
Well, Buggs, this weekend’s T10S certainly spoke to you on a personal level! Cool about your great-great-grandpa. I’m glad he survived, since you wouldn’t be here otherwise.
My BFF goes to NASCAR races when they’re in Phoenix, and she texts me photos of all of the interesting characters she sees there (our hobby is trying to out-do each other on the weirdo-watching). The sport itself just really doesn’t appeal to me, but I don’t enjoy sports in general.
You win!
I first learned about the Titanic when I was about 8 or 9 and my mom checked a video of The Unsinkable Molly Brown out of the library for my musical-loving little heart. Thought Kathy Bates played her excellently in the Cameron debacle.
I loathe the Cameron version. All that endless shouting of “Jack!” “Rose!” “Jack!” “Rose!” So unnecessary.
I also hated the batty old woman Rose. Why did she keep the giant diamond? It belonged to Hoxley, not Jack…so it wasn’t sentimental. And it could have financed her family for generations. Instead she tosses it overboard. Idiot.
The body in the flowing gown shot from underneath floating silohetted against the massive stained glass dome got me, as did those who met their death with such dignity.
Did you know the violinist who played Nearer My God To Thee really did so? His father is the one who wrote it, and he always told people if he was on a sinking ship, that’s what he would do.
Hear, hear! Jack and Rose would have made it in the real world about as successfully as Romeo and Juliet would have done. The only thing that made their relationship a great romance was the element of rebellion and the separation by tragedy. If they had managed to stay together despite their difference in station, within 5 years they would have been miserable, as Rose suffered in a 9th floor tenement apartment with a passel of squalling youngsters, constantly reminding Jack of everything she gave up to be with him, while he squandered his already insufficient income on cheap booze and losing at poker.
Did not know that about the violinist, but I did know that “Nearer My God to Thee” was played at the funerals of both William McKinley and James Garfield, the two “forgotten” assassinated presidents.
You’re probably one of those people who actually watched and enjoyed Ken Burn’s “The Civil War,” aren’t you? (I am.)
You sure didn’t complain when you watched the Griffin/Bonnar fight.
That was nothing but pure, juicy goodness. Ultimate fighting isn’t a sport, it’s anthropology.
I remember Garfield. He was an orange cat.
Yes. Am watching a documentary on Goebbel’s Titanic movie on History International.
How can you shame me in front of new people?
Joseph Goebbels? The Nazi Propaganda Minister? I had no idea such a thing existed and am very intrigued.
You two are a riot! Nascar is good for people.watching!! granted we have only gone to Vegas, and not to the south.
I am watching the Mini series of Titanic now. Now if this was the original, that would have been fine by me!!
the old couple holding hands in bed got me as well. I think the fact that Jack and Rose ran through the ship over and over is what got to me…and now it is in 3D?!?! dude you are a bazillionare and you are married to Nancy Wilson of heart, pretty sure you aren’t. hurting for money!!
sorry for the typos!!
I thought Nancy Wilson was married to Cameron Crowe! Did I miss something?
Oh, you might be right!! Cameron Crowe, James Cameron…. big deal
Yes you were correct. they got a divorce in 2010.
How about in front of us old people? (hope this gets placed correctly)
I wish you people would quit complaining about the way I drive……
Mother! Isn’t this your naptime?
It always tickles the cynical pumping device that passes for my heart when a “Tonight’s Top 10″ post gets this many comments.
As it should, SuperB.
Of course you pad them.
Your comments about Titanic are less than informed. It’s not “from” ABC; it’s a Canadian/British production that ABC just bought the rights to also show. It’s written by Julian Fellowes, the creator of Downton Abbey, which made it required viewing for me. And it’s in non-chronological order, each episode from different points of view (kind of like Boomtown.) While it’s not great, it’s not bad.
Thanks for the additional info about the show. I was wondering why things didn’t seem to be occurring in chronological order in the episode descriptions. If anybody needs me I’ll be in the basement, self-flagellating with the shiny new flail that I got for Easter and calling myself an ignorant slut.