Tonight’s Top 10 TV Shows, Monday, Jan. 9

Watercooler

By NotWithoutMyTV | Monday, January 9, 2012 | 12:00 am | 6 Comments
Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
Posted in: Watercooler

Monday, Jan. 9

The Bachelor (ABC, 8 pm) Twelve bachelorettes try out for a community theater production written by children.

That’s totally meta, considering that the Bachelor’s story arcs are written for children.

Antiques Roadshow (PBS, 8 pm) A 1960 first edition copy of “To Kill a Mockingbird”; collection of bronzes; rare 1924 Gibson F-5 Lloyd Loar mandolin.

A tea cup with Eleanor Roosevelt’s lip stick on it, a cigar stub Winston Churchill once licked, and a taxidermied collie that might have been one of Lassie’s pups.

Fear Factor (NBC, 9 pm) Contestants face stunts that include eating a lunchbox full of roaches and grasshoppers.

Is it a Star Wars lunchbox? C’mon, show! You know it makes a difference.

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (Bravo, 9pm) Kim and her new boyfriend arrive in Hawaii; Kyle confronts Kim about her behavior.

Why now? Kim’s been sucking that crack pipe since Season 1.

Cake Boss: Next Great Baker (TLC, 9 pm) It is the ultimate test; the bakers must create an off-beat wedding cake for a true bridezilla.

Buddy doesn’t know about ‘inside voice’.

America’s Money Class with Suze Orman (OWN, 9 pm) Erasing debt forever.

Don’t buy more shit than you can pay for. Yeah. I don’t know why you didn’t think of it, either.

Rock Center with Brian Williams (NBC, 10 pm) GOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney’s roots in Mexico.

Mitt Romney: the Latino’s candidate.

Scouted (E1, 10 pm) Marissa isn’t sure she has what it takes; Hallie isn’t sure she’s ready to leave her art studies to be a full-time model.

I’m not sure either of them has what it takes to assemble a Whopper.

How Do I Look? (Style, 10 pm) Sylina’s family members and future in-laws do not care for her choice of bright, tight outfits.

If Sylina wants to sell it, she’s gotta put it in the front window.

Jimmy Kimmel Live (ABC, 12 am) Uh Huh Her performs.

I don’t know who Uh Huh Her is. But I do know they can’t make Jimmy cool.

By day, I'm an editor. That means I get a cruel thrill out of identifying the parts of other people's creative projects that suck, and alerting those people to said suckage. Sometimes, I get paid for it. I've been known to lose my appetite after seeing how a Thai menu has folded, spindled, and mutilated the Queen's English. Imagine what TV does to me! I guess that's why I wanted to be a recapper at TVgasm. My friends have heard all of my rants, and they are sick of them. TVgasm is a whole new captive audience! So, let's make a compact, you and I: you agree to read my recaps and take what amusement you can from them, and I agree to put into the print the outrageous observations about the show that you thought, but were too PC to say. Let's share our joyous rage after wasting another perfectly good hour in front of the television.

Oh, and I still believe that Magnum, P.I. was the greatest show on television. Although I have not seen Thomas Magnum fishtail that Ferrari in the opening credits since I was 14. If Magnum, P.I. actually sucked, keep your damn squeal hole shut and don't ruin it for me, OK?

6 Comments

  1. 1
    Fan-Ann
    Posted January 9, 2012 at 4:29 am

    I seriously love Antiques Road Show. I wish I could afford a first edition of “To Kill A Mockingbird” for my husband. We watch the movie about once a year and every time is a revelation. Maybe I need to watch it again soon to atone for my reality tv habit!

  2. 2
    MatisyahuSerious
    Posted January 9, 2012 at 10:39 am

    **SPOILER ALERT**

    i heard from an inside source at nbc that tonight’s episode of fear factor is going to include a busty female contestant in a tight tank top.

  3. 3
    NotWithoutMyTV NotWithoutMyTV
    Posted January 9, 2012 at 10:42 am

    Then I’ll have my people clear my schedule between 9 and 10 pm tonight.

  4. 4
    Moli Moli
    Posted January 9, 2012 at 10:52 am

    @MatisyahuSerious…bwhahahahahahahaha

  5. 5
    Laura Gill
    Posted January 9, 2012 at 2:07 pm

    How could you forget Hoarders on A&E? It’s like my grandparents’ house, just without the smell.

  6. 6
    MatisyahuSerious
    Posted January 9, 2012 at 10:32 pm

    my sources, lamentably, did not tip me off to the fact that one of the under-dressed female contestants would be none other than american idol season six cast off antonella maria barba.

    stupid sources, no head for you!

Post a Comment

Your email is never published nor shared. Required fields are marked *

*
*

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

Human Verification: In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.