Tonight’s Top 10 TV Shows, Wed., June 13th

Watercooler

By NotWithoutMyTV | Wednesday, June 13, 2012 | 11:02 am | 0 Comments
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Posted in: Tonight's Top 10 Shows, Watercooler

Wednesday, June 13th

Duets (ABC, 9:30 pm) In this new take on the old singing competition formula, music industry greats Kelly Clarkson, Jennifer Nettles, John Legend, and Robin Thicke forgo the judges’ table to travel the country individually, searching for undiscovered talent to perform with and mentor.

9:30 seems a little late in the evening for family entertainment.

 

Yes, I did it. But look how sorry I am.

Dogs in the City (CBS, 8 pm) Justin helps Russell Simmons’ executive assistant with her special-needs dog; helping a family learn how to discipline their bloodhounds.

 My mom and dad’s bloodhound is basically inert. Objects that don’t move are rarely need discipline.

So You Think You Can Dance (FOX, 8 pm) Cat Deeley returns as host for the ninth season of the summer dance competition that scours the nation for undiscovered talent. Hopefuls perform their best moves at auditions across the nation.

I bet the air in Cat Deeley’s mouth tastes like strawberry ice cream.

Melissa & Joey (ABC FAMILY, 8 pm) Mel punches a person in Ryder’s defense, then must think fast when video of the altercation is posted online.

Oh, Mel. The only two things that show up on the Internet faster than fight footage are big ass sex tapes and Marines urinating on dead combatants.

Nature (PBS, 8 pm) Live-action footage, along with high-definition cameras and computer graphics, reveals what happens when animals of astounding ability connect with one another.

How are they defining “connect”? Dating and mating? Murder and dining?

 

Larry Hagman’s eyebrows have their own Facebook page.

Dallas (TNT, 9 pm) The family gathers at Southfork Ranch for a wedding; an old rivalry crosses generations.

Dr. Drew (Headline News, 9 pm) Practicing physician, professor, author, radio show host and reality TV star Dr. Drew Pinsky finds time to go prime time on Headline News.

The difference between Dr. Drew and Snooki Polizzi is that one of them has licensed access to drugs.

Restaurant Impossible (FOOD NETWORK, 10 pm) A non-profit community center that provides after-school meals, a resource room and family cooking classes.

Darn. Sounds really exciting, but my DVR, she is full.

Through the Wormhole with Morgan Freeman (Science Channel, 10 pm) Scientists are probing into the cosmos for it’s beating heart and computing brain.

I bet the universe knows the difference between its and it’s.

Around the World in 80 Plates (BRAVO, 10 pm) Tortellini in Bologna; past grievances lead to conflict between two chefs.

Conflict: sweet, yet piquant.

By day, I'm an editor. That means I get a cruel thrill out of identifying the parts of other people's creative projects that suck, and alerting those people to said suckage. Sometimes, I get paid for it. I've been known to lose my appetite after seeing how a Thai menu has folded, spindled, and mutilated the Queen's English. Imagine what TV does to me! I guess that's why I wanted to be a recapper at TVgasm. My friends have heard all of my rants, and they are sick of them. TVgasm is a whole new captive audience! So, let's make a compact, you and I: you agree to read my recaps and take what amusement you can from them, and I agree to put into the print the outrageous observations about the show that you thought, but were too PC to say. Let's share our joyous rage after wasting another perfectly good hour in front of the television.

Oh, and I still believe that Magnum, P.I. was the greatest show on television. Although I have not seen Thomas Magnum fishtail that Ferrari in the opening credits since I was 14. If Magnum, P.I. actually sucked, keep your damn squeal hole shut and don't ruin it for me, OK?

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