Error: Twitter did not respond. Please wait a few minutes and refresh this page.
Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town (ABC Family, 8 pm): A mailman explains why Santa has whiskers, lives at the North Pole and brings presents once a year.
From a more innocent time when Santa could say “If you sit on my lap today, a smile and a kiss is the price you’ll pay,” and no one called the cops.
Community (ABC, 8 pm): When the Greendale glee club is unable to make the holiday pageant, the choir director asks the study group to fill in.
Sounds like Glee, only not annoying.
The X Factor (Fox, 8 pm): Contestants face elimination; performances by Mary J. Blige and Lenny Kravitz.
Lenny Kravitz hates American Idol. But he’ll perform on The X Factor.
America’s Funniest Home Videos (ABC, 9 pm): Christmas spectacular.
Santa gets hit in the nuts, a ferret climbs up Santa’s leg, Santa eats bad sushi, Santa flips over the handlebars, Santa does a flaming shot and needs a skin graft.
The Year Without a Santa Claus (ABC Family, 9 pm): Feeling sad and unwanted, Santa takes the day off before Christmas.
Kringle, you pop a Prozac and you get your ass in that sleigh, ‘cause Christmas is an essential public service, and you are not allowed to strike.
Bones (Fox, 9 pm): The team suspects murder when a storm chaser is killed while filming a tornado; Booth becomes increasingly protective of Brennan.
Ever since I saw Twister, I’ve had an irrational hatred of storm chasers.
The O’Reilly Factor (Fox News Channel, 9 pm): Conservative pundit Bill O’Reilly takes a forceful and often combative stance as he talks with newsmakers and entertainers from his “no-spin zone.”
He’s not an asshole, he’s “forceful and combative”.
A Miser Brothers’ Christmas (ABC Family, 10 pm): The battling Miser brothers, Heat and Snow, must put aside their differences and help save the holiday when an injured Santa is unable to deliver gifts.
It’s in the Miser brothers’ settlement that this travesty can only be shown after 10 pm at night.
The Great Big American Auction (ABC, 10 pm): Ty and the team scour the country for rare and valuable items; people’s lives are changed after their hidden treasures are auctioned for hundreds of thousands of dollars.
If you’re one of the five people in the U.S. that doesn’t think Ty Pennington is a double-decaf douche nozzle, maybe you’ll like this.
The Mentalist (CBS, 10 pm): The team investigates a retired professional football player’s presumed death after his car explodes; Harrigan and Rigsby move forward in their relationship.
Boom, boom, boom. Let’s go up to my room.