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Friday, June 15th
Deadliest Catch (8 pm) Tempers on deck flare as temperatures plunge and every skipper steels himself for battle.
This is Deadliest Catch’s version of “The contestants sing; one is eliminated.”
Countdown to Niagara: The Greatest Megastunts of All Time (ABC, 8 pm) Impressive stunts over the ages.
And a lot of time-filling blah-blah you can probably skip.
Community (8:30 pm) Jeff and Shirley bond over foosball; after breaking Abed’s limited edition “Dark Knight” DVD, Annie claims that someone broke into the apartment and stole it.
The problem with foosball is that it’s a nonmarketable skill after you graduate from college.
Need to Know (PBS, 8:30) Fixing America: A panel discussion on America’s immigration policies features Eliseo Medina, Renku Sen, Linda Chavez and Mark Krikorian.
I hope they address that FWed email I got last week, saying “WE NED TU FIX AMERCA BY THROUGHING OUT ALL THE ILEGALS THAT GO AND TAKE ALL R JOBS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Megastunts—Highwire Over Niagara Falls, Live! (ABC, 9 pm) Daredevil Nik Wallenda crosses Horseshoe Falls, the largest of the falls that make up Niagara Falls, on a tightrope.
ABC made Nik Wallenda wear a safety tether. I hope he at least told them, “I am Nik Wallenda, of the Flying Wallendas, and your concern insults me.”
Dateline NBC (NBC, 9 pm) A woman who was conned by a former rap star seeks revenge.
My rapper name is going to be ‘nilla Wafer. Once my single gets some Youtube views.
Whale Wars (Animal Planet, 9 pm) The Steve Irwin and Bob Barker race to assist the Brigitte Bardot, but the storm-battered scout vessel may not survive the night.
I know naming a ship after Steve Irwin isn’t supposed to be funny, but…
Great Performances (PBS, 9 pm) Harry Connick Jr. performs a mix of standards, show tunes and jazz classics, backed by a 20-piece swing band and 10-piece string section, at the Neil Simon Theater in New York City.
All you 50-something ladies, throw your panties on the stage!!
Randy to the Rescue (TLC, 10 pm) Randy works to rescue bride Janine from her body image issues; Tayna wants a look to honor the memory of her father; Molly is looking for a sexy 60′s style.
Tanya… wants to honor the memory… of her father… with a look. Tanya, you dumb bitch.
Serial Killer Earth (H2, 11 pm) A tornado rips through an airport; a massive landslide chases a group of construction workers; an earthquake threatens a 700-year-old church.
Those dope-smokin’ hippies keep telling us to “Love our Mother”. Well, what if your Mother is using every trick she knows to try to kill you?